Title: Harry, the Healer
Author: ave ebony
Rating: NC-17 (adult)
Pairing: HP/SS
Disclaimer: I wish Severus, Harry and all the surroundings were mine, but sadly, my pockets are empty.
Feedback: YES, please: ave_ebony@yahoo.com
Beta: Mika Bird, the best beta ever. Don't bother to ask, I won't lend her!
Archive: Part of the From Dusk till Dawn Severus Snape/Harry Potter Fuh-Q-Fest at http://www.kardasi.com/HPSS/storyindex.htm
Challenge: 'Not here, Not now! No magic?'
Professor Snape,
I refer to you as one of the foremost specialists on the Wolfsbane Potion. Is it possible to treat a six-year-old child with the Potion? And if yes, would you be willing to supply it?
Please, state your price and the conditions, on which you would be prepared to brew it on a regular basis,
Sincerely,
Severus was reading the words for the fourth time. He already knew the answer, though. He would brew it. Regularly. He may not particularly like werewolves but he desperately needed money for his experiments. The bloody Umbridge woman had been fighting, and quite successfully he might add, with all her strength and cunning and she had managed to cut the Ministry financial support for Hogwarts by so much, that Albus had had to cut their salaries by half. Now there were simply no funds for anything, least of all for extra potion ingredients. Every extra income was welcome. And Severus was brewing Lupin's Wolfsbane anyway, so he wouldn't need any extra time, he would just have to watch over two cauldrons instead of one.
He sat down, wrote a brief answer, stating a price, which was neither low nor outrageous, and added a request to be paid in advance for the first two months. He handed the scroll to the huge brown owl that was waiting for a reply and it flew with a soft hoot.
Severus poured himself a cup of tea and sighed contentedly. He had to admit to himself that he felt flattered to be turned to by a European Healer, even if he never heard of the man. ‘One of the foremost specialists,' Severus repeated to himself, ‘mmm, sounds good.'
Two days later the own flew in again.
Professor Snape,
Thank you for agreeing and thus helping the child immensely. Your price is acceptable. I would like to give you the advance personally and to do it in the way we will pass the brewed potion in future. This way we can hopefully forestall any problems with delivering the first dose. Would you prefer me to floo to Hogwarts or for you to travel here?
Sincerely,
Harry Potter
Severus ordered some cold cuts for the owl and he was pacing his room restlessly, thinking. He was, of course, aware of the fact that he would have to meet either the Healer or someone else personally, because it wasn't possible to simply pass the goblet of Wolfsbane Potion through the floo. Now, however, he started pondering all low points of such an arrangement. Severus couldn't floo anywhere safely, now that his position as a spy was compromised. Severus was well aware that all of this could simply be a Death-Eater ploy to get near him.
In the end, he went to consult with Albus. The Headmaster's first question was, annoyingly enough, if the brewing of the child's wolfsbane would not interfere with Lupin's potion. Severus gritted his teeth. However, Albus agreed to open the floo in Severus' quarters for a short period of time. The headmaster also assured Severus that he would inquire about the Healer and his background. Nobody had a better information network than Albus. Severus was grateful and he even managed to convey it.
ss*hp*ss
Severus was waiting on one side of the fireplace, his wand in his hand. There was a soft green blaze and a bespectacled young man with raven hair stepped out of the fireplace. He looked around and a wary look appeared in his green eyes when he saw Severus' wand pointed on him.
“Professor Snape?” he asked with a polite smile.
Severus nodded sharply.
“I am Harry Potter. Nice to meet you, sir.”
Severus didn't acknowledge his greetings in a smallest gesture and barked: “Password?”
“Bezoar.” Harry smiled pleasantly again.
But the Potion Master's attitude hadn't changed: “A question if you don't mind. What is the cure for a bite inflicted by an airslair viper?” He asked icily.
Harry Potter blinked: “Wha-- Was someone bitten?” He asked, agitated.
“No, it is merely a precaution. You are supposed to be a Healer if I recall correctly.” Severus' wand hand twitched warningly.
“Ah, I see. Well, it's Finish viper antidote, usually. Or Hans Munnes' antidote, if the patient is allergic to zinc.”
Severus nodded again and pocketed his wand. He motioned towards the table. “Tea or coffee?” he offered, even though he hadn't had the smallest intention to prolong the Healer's visit a minute before. But now... The man was exquisite. Small lean frame, slender neck, black nest of unruly hair and green eyes that shone with intelligence and life, a bit hidden behind his glasses, which had unusual round shape, but suited him very well.
Severus could appreciate beauty and the chances to enjoy himself, or at least his eyes, were so rare, that it would be a sin to waste this one.
“Thank you, professor. A small cup of black tea, please. Unfortunately, I have to leave soon, as my work shift starts in a half an hour.”
They sat in Severus' huge twin black armchairs and Severus ordered the tea.
“I wondered if you could recommend me any literature on werewolves, Professor Snape. I made a quick search in our Library and in The Central Wizardry Library of Berlin, but the only book that I found didn't give me any of the information I needed.” He looked at Snape expectantly. Severus had to admire the green depths of the younger man's eyes.
Severus forced his eyes turn to the kettle, two cups, a sugar bowel and a small jug of milk that appeared on the table. He poured the tea for his guest and asked: “What was the title of the book you found, Mr. Potter?”
“Just ‘Harry', please. Well, it was a Russian book; the English title would probably be something like ‘How to Kill a Werewolf'. Not very helpful for me, as I said. The general books on healing never mention werewolves, or at least, none of those I have read through the years do.”
“Call me Severus, then, Harry.” Severus tried to sound casual, even though it had been years since anyone offered him first-names terms. He was rewarded with a beautiful smile. The gentle curve of the lips was truly breath-taking.
“The literature on werewolves is very limited, unfortunately. Any books on the subject are usually quite old and rare and the facts included there are not very reliable. I own two books on the topic, which I can borrow you, if you like.”
“It would be very nice of you, Severus.”
The Potion Master found that he liked to hear his name from those pink lips. He also liked the plausible excuse to see the sympathetic Healer again that appeared before him: “We can discuss the books later and I can impart to you some pieces of information that I have picked up during years. I don't offer you my notes, as they are unreadable to someone without extensive Potions training.” Severus paused. “All I was interested in, was information related to the area of potions. Even though it covers quite a wide range,” the Potion Master continued slowly, pensively, “it doesn't include anything about werewolves' social life, the laws linked with the curse and so on. Maybe the werewolf I know could help you there.” ‘I can't believe I am saying that,' Severus thought.
“Severus, I don't know how to thank you. The child was bitten just two weeks ago, and so there is only two weeks left before his first transformation. I need to find everything in such a short time.”
“You care deeply of the child,” Severus observed and thought about Harry's relation to the child. ‘Had he known it before it was bitten? Is it of his family or his friends'?'
“He is my patient. Of course I care.” Harry checked the old clock on the wall and sighed, “I have to go now. Please, could you borrow me the books?”
“Of course. A minute.” Severus went to his workroom. He came back nearly immediately. He came up behind Harry and breathed in his pleasant scent. Harry was using a very decent eau de cologne . ‘Is that possible that he would be interested in men?' Severus put two thin books on the table.
Harry started. “Oh! You walk soundlessly like a ghost, Severus!”
Severus smiled. “Sorry,” he said.
“No, you are not,” Harry smiled again. ‘Was it flirting?' Severus wondered, clueless.
”Here is the salary,” Harry put a thick sachet on the table and said a formula, which was rarely heard now, “You would do me a favour if you weighed and counted it yourself.”
‘Mmmm, the best manners.' Severus added another asset to the list. The formula was a very polite acknowledgement that the paying part was aware of the need of the receiving part to check they were given the money agreed.
“Thank you, Harry. But I am sure it will be al right,” Severus declined. After all, Harry wanted him to brew the potion repeatedly, so cheating wouldn't be very wise.
Harry gave him a little bow. “I will be on my way, then. It was a real pleasure to meet you. I mean it,” he added, almost as an afterthought. “It wasn't just a phrase.”
“Good bye, Harry.” A spark of green flames and then the Potion Master was alone again.
Severus was looking at the empty fireplace for a long time. ‘Merlin, I want him!' The desire was so strong that it hurt. It wasn't lust. Well, not entirely, anyway. Severus felt this for the first time since his student years - he fell in love.
ss*hp*ss
Severus,
Your books were very helpful, especially supplemented with your observations in the margin.
I wonder if you would be willing to meet me to discuss the subject during the weekend. I am free between the hours of 7.30am and 6.50pm. Would you prefer to meet at Hogwarts or outside? Could I take you out to breakfast, lunch or tea?
Sincerely,
Harry evidently hadn't a clue about Severus' being on the Death-eaters' ‘wanted dead or alive' list. Or he did but was too polite to mention it.
Severus still couldn't figure out whether the younger man had been flirting with him or whether it had simply been his open friendliness. Thanks to Dumbledore, now at least he knew Harry was interested in men. The Headmaster fed Severus this information without apparent reason. Or at least Severus hoped that his interest in Harry wasn't apparent. Severus groaned inwardly.
The Potion Master tried to write a friendly letter, but had to admit to himself that he was failing miserably. After five attempts that sounded like unctuous begging, pathetic whining or ingratiating obtrusiveness, Severus gave up and wrote a Snape-like note. He was angry with himself, but when all was said and done, he was who he was and to pretend he was someone else would only bring him disappointment later on.
Harry,
Floo here on Saturday at noon, we can start our discussion during lunch. The werewolf, whom I mentioned last time, should join us around 3 o'clock.
Sincerely,
Severus
ss*hp*ss
'Gods, he is delightful!' was Severus' first thought when his guest stepped out of the fireplace.
“Hello, Severus,” he smiled in a friendly way and Severus surprised himself by smiling back.
“Let's have lunch, then,“ Severus motioned towards the table in the middle of the living room. On the way to the table Severus admired Harry's body, clad in black fitting trousers and a warm green sweater. This time there were no robes covering the beauty. It was all Severus could do not to start salivating over Harry's pert backside. He willed his growing erection down. 'This is going to be trying.'
During lunch the conversation circled mainly around the werewolves and potions, but Severus learned a few personal things about the young Healer. Actually, Harry wasn't that young, he was thirty, only some six years younger than Severus.
“You look younger. Much younger.”
Harry blushed. “I know. I should probably thank you for the compliment. But for a Healer there's no advantage in looking too young. It's harder to gain both the trust and authority.” Harry's blush deepened when he added: “It's also harder to be considered a mature partner.”
“I didn't find anything immature yet,” Severus said. 'See, I can flirt as well.'
They moved in the comfy armchairs with dessert and tea and their discussion turned wholly to the subject of werewolves. Severus had to admit that Harry had learned a lot in just a few days. He also found that the Healer had a surprisingly large background in Potions.
“I like to prepare potions on my own. Not all of them, of course. I enjoy brewing.”
“Why didn't you specialise in Potions, then?” Severus asked curiously.
“It's quite a long story. The short version is that I always wanted to be a Healer. My father made me specialise in the Dark Arts. And so I ended up as a Healer specialised in injuries and damages caused by hexes and dark magic.”
“It would be interesting to hear the long version some day,” Severus said and meant it.
All too soon they were joined by Remus Lupin.
Severus felt a bit anxious when he went to the doors to let Lupin in. He and Lupin hadn't been on the best of terms. Severus couldn't forget a little prank of Lupin's best friends, where Severus would have been served as dinner to the beast. Severus knew Lupin was innocent in the matter, but he still disliked him for it. And he never cared to hide the dislike. Lupin had a friendly and gentle nature and Severus was nearly sure the werewolf wouldn't cast aspersions before his guest. Hopefully.
“Hello, Severus.”
“Come in, Lupin. Remus.” Severus realised it would look odd if he and Harry used first names while he addressed Lupin by his family name. 'And maybe Lupin is not that bad, after all,' Severus thought and then he realised with disgust that he, indeed, was trying to appear better, or at least different, than he was, in front of Harry.
Remus seemed to be a bit surprised but didn't comment on it. “Severus.” He showed a smile.
“Harry is in the living room.” Severus said to mask his discomfiture.
They approached Harry, who rose from his chair and smiled at Remus: “I am Harry Potter, thank you very much for coming.”
“Remus Lupin. I could hardly refuse when one of my kind is in need.”
Harry gave him even broader smile.
Severus gritted his teeth. ‘Marvellous. Now they can kiss each other.' He knew he wasn't being reasonable, because Lupin was straight as a flagpole, but...
“Please, sit down,” he said and summoned a chair for himself. “What will you drink?”
“Green tea, please.” Remus eased into Severus' armchair.
“Severus fed me a large amount of information on potions, the digestive system of werewolves and much more such facts. I wonder if you could help me with the boy's mental and physical needs during the transformation, Mr. Lupin. And his needs during the other 27 days and nights if they are different from healthy children,” Harry added as an afterthought.
“Maybe we could call each other by our first names, Harry?” Remus said and Harry nodded, smiling. “The boy will transform for the first time?”
“Yes, Remus. We need to create a safe and friendly place for him, but my knowledge on werewolves is so limited-” Harry shook his head in despair.
“You must be a really good Healer, I guess. I like your approach.” Remus said and Severus sighed inwardly. 'That is what I thought, but I can never say it aloud, not to mention make it sound genuine and amicable.' There was no chance for Severus to gain the young Healer's attention. Even if Severus wasn't so ugly, he was unapproachable, or he seemed to be.
Harry blushed and averted his eyes. “I just don't like to see children suffer, but I am hardly unique in this. And it was proven that the patient's mental state is very important for healing long term injuries or it's effects.”
“You see a werewolf as a patient, not as a beast. It is quite unique and I speak with the experience of many years.”
“Uh- Okay. Thank you, Remus. Let's just say that I care. You care as well. So, please, share some more general information with me, so I can get up to speed and then perhaps we can plan the best way to look after the child during the full moon.”
Severus admired the Healer's systematic approach. The next two hours he spent sitting in near silence and listening intently to Remus' explanations, Harry's questions and Remus' answers. The whole issue was more interesting than Severus would have supposed.
In the middle of a debate about toys fitting for a young puppy werewolf Harry's stomach rumbled rather loudly.
“Oh, sorry,” he apologised, blushing.
“Hungry?” Severus asked.
“Oh, is it this late already?” Remus started when he looked at the wall clock. “I am supposed to be in Dumbledore's office in ten minutes. Maybe we should meet again to finish the discussion, Harry?”
“Yes, I would like that very much. Um, Severus, do you want to be present too, or have we already bored you to death?” Harry asked with apologetic smile.
“I quite enjoyed myself,” Severus admitted, “It was more interesting than I had believed. We can meet here tomorrow afternoon, if it's suitable to the both of you.”
“I can't be here before 3 p.m.,” Remus said and explained, “I managed to find a part-time job.”
Harry smiled at him. “I guess it's hard with all the prejudice. You must tell me more about this too, I want to know what is waiting for my patient outside of our Centre.”
“See you, Harry.”
Severus led Remus towards the door through the hall and just before he lowered the wards Remus caught his wrist, grinned at him and whispered: “Had Sirius been here, he would have said: 'You are a lucky bastard, Snape' .”
“What are you talking about?” Severus snapped equally silent.
“About a young man who is clever, gentle and handsome and who is sitting in your armchair and has feelings for you."
“He has... Is it a kind of prank?” The dark eyes narrowed in suspicion.
“Severus, we are too old for pranks. I am being honest. I don't know what he feels for you, but he is definitely not indifferent.”
“I- You are going to be late for your appointment with Dumbledore.” Severus lowered the wards and let Remus out.
“See you tomorrow, Severus,” Remus said and left.
Severus was standing there silently for a minute and tried to sort out his thoughts. 'Losing your vigilance now, Severus?' his inner voice mocked him. He shook his head angrily and closed the door and warded it. Then he tried to collect himself one more minute . 'Now I know I have a chance. If the werewolf was honest.' But the fact was, he believed the werewolf. Lupin wouldn't mock him in this way. Black would, but not Lupin.
He went back to the living room and in the doorway his breath caught in his throat. Harry was sleeping peacefully, sprawled in his armchair. 'Positively delightful.' Severus felt he could get used to this view.
However, Harry opened his eyes in alertness the very second Severus entered the room. His hand reached for his wand unconsciously. Then Harry realised where he was and lowered it, shamefaced.
“Sorry,” he cleared his throat; “It's the training I went through. Sorry.”
“It's fine. I can appreciate quality training.” Severus assured him and realised that sometimes telling the truth can also be giving praise. The thought bemused him slightly.
“Still, I fell asleep in your armchair,” Harry insisted, “I am sorry. Tonight is my sixth night work shift and I kind of... lost it.”
“How many are before you?” Severus asked.
“This night and the next, twelve hours. We are understaffed and with the war running, patients come in floods. But, sorry, I didn't mean to whine.” Harry had that apologetic look in his eyes again, but Severus could also read tiredness and exhaustion in his face. ‘Chronic lack of sleep and still he insists to talk about one of his patients in detail.'
“I recommend you have a quick bite to eat and then have a nap in my bedroom. I suppose you need to leave ten minutes before seven as yesterday? It gives you more than an hour of sleep.”
Harry stared at him with an unreadable expression: “That sounds great, just-“
“You can ward the bedroom, I fully understand that.” Severus realised that Harry's training probably prevented him from sleeping tranquilly in an unfamiliar environment.
“You understand so much,” Harry said, evidently amazed.
“What kind of sandwiches do you like?” Severus got back to the table they had had the lunch at.
“Cheese ones, please. And a bit of salad if I can.” Harry followed Severus to the table. “Severus, I meant that. Usually people don't understand that-- They have take it personally that I can't feel comfortable when I feel vulnerable and they--“
Severus cut off his sheepish stammering. “A warrior's training is not that uncommon. Eat now or it will be too late to have a rest.”
“Yes, sir.” Harry grinned and then gave him one of his trademark broad smiles and Severus' heart melted. Other part of his body was far from melting, though. The part he went to take care of in the bathroom the very minute Harry left him to get a bit of sleep.
Lately, Severus' wanking scenarios were all very much alike. Severus imagined Harry touching his body, Harry's clean hands petting Severus' hair, Harry' light cologne smell, his kisses on Severus' neck, his hands wandering everywhere... Severus bit his lip to prevent a moan when he climaxed. 'Even my wanking imagination get back to my teenage years, not only my appetite.'
The rest of the hour Severus sat in his black armchair with a book in his lap, but his thoughts were wandering. He knew he had met a man of his life. He didn't know, however, how to win him.
At a quarter to seven Harry reappeared and asked if he could use the bathroom. He looked less tired, though not fresh. His hair was an even bigger mess than before. Severus smiled.
“What?” Harry smiled back.
Severus shook his head. “Your hair is like an owl's nest.”
“Oh, don't say that in front of Angel,” Harry grinned and when Severus seemed at a loss he explained, “Angel is my owl, that brown one I sent you. And my hair can not be tamed. Not even cut. It always grows back during the night. This door?”
Severus nodded and waited until Harry came back. He had wanted to invite Harry for lunch, but now, when he knew about the Healer's weariness, he just said: “So tomorrow at 3 p.m.”
“See you, Severus. And thank you.”
A green flash and the fire was burning as if nothing happened.
ss*hp*ss
Harry stepped out of the fireplace five minutes before three o'clock. “Hi, Severus.”
“Harry.” Severus had been up since dawn, but suddenly he knew his day started right now. “Black tea as usual?”
“Yes, please.” Harry sat in his usual armchair. “I like your rooms. I have never seen a living room decorated only in black, white and various shades of grey before, but it's perfect. And it somehow corresponds with you nicely. And your bedroom all in green is gorgeous.”
Severus was a bit at a loss what to say. Harry seemed to be able to leave him speechless like no one else. Well, with the exception of Albus probably. He decided on simple 'thank you' but before he spoke, Harry's stomach gave a rather loud rumble.
“Hungry?” Severus asked.
“Um, yes, sorry,” Harry apologised. “I didn't get back home before eleven and I failed to wake up a few minutes sooner to get some food.”
“Utterly impossible. You need somebody to take care about you,” Severus reprimanded him.
Harry smiled sheepishly. Then he asked, blushing: “If you knew me better, would you consider applying for the position?”
'If I knew him better? What is that supposed to mean?' Severus wondered. But he was sure enough about Harry's interest now and so he decided to show cards. “Yes. I would apply right now and I would get to know you better in the process.”
“You would?” Harry beamed. Severus held his breath. He had never seen eyes more alive, more vibrant, greener, more beautiful. He approached Harry slowly, dropped down on one knee, and slowly lowered his head till their lips met. The first kiss was tentative, Severus wanted to be sure the younger man wished to be kissed. There was no resistance, and Severus tasted the lips again, longer and deeper. Harry parted his lips and let Severus' tongue slip in and taste his unique flavour.
The Potion Master pulled away, and he had to smirk when he heard a little noise of complaint from the other man.
“Lunch first,” he said, “taking care about you, remember? What should I order?”
“Roasted chicken and potatoes? I like chicken. And salad, please.”
Severus flooed the order to kitchens and then he asked Harry: “Do you often have engagements in the both the morning and the afternoon when you have to work night shifts? It really doesn't leave too much time for sleeping.”
“In the morning I had to stay at the Centre longer. There were severe fights during the night and we had tons of patients. We put some in the time-turners and time-lockers and dealt with them afterwards.”
“Isn't that illegal?” Severus asked, surprised.
The meal and cutlery appeared on the table and Harry started ravishing the food. “Well, technically it is, but we don't send them back in time, just stop the time for them. Ministry tolerates it. Don't tell anyone, though, we keep it a kind of secret, as the time-turners could attract unwanted attention. Some people are able to attack a healing centre, you know.”
Severus nodded. Then his wards announced Severus that Lupin had arrived and so he went to open the door.
“Severus,” Lupin smiled and came in.
“Remus. Thank you,” the Potion Master said and smirked.
“What- “ the werewolf started but then grinned, “Severus, get that smug expression from your face.”
Severus led his guest into the living room and pondered how shamefully long it took him to accept Remus as a friend.
As it turned out, Remus was quite hungry too, and so their discussion changed into something of an impromptu lunch. They were talking mainly about werewolves and the shape shifting.
“I might join him for the full moon night, if your rules allow it. It could help him, to have an adult werewolf around. The night is more bearable when you are not alone.” Remus saddened visibly.
Harry's eyes showed worry about the sudden change in Remus' mood. The young Healer was evidently waiting for more, but when the werewolf kept silent, Harry asked another question. Severus appreciated Harry's tact.
'He is really incredible. In so many ways. How is it possible that he has feelings for me?' It was a mystery for Severus. He was nervous about not knowing what Harry liked about him, because if he wouldn't keep doing it, whatever it was... 'I am going insane. I don't even have him properly and I am thinking about losing him.'
A little before six o'clock Remus excused himself claiming he was tired, but the winks and grin he produced when Severus led him to the doors didn't leave any doubts about the real reason.
“Thank you,” Severus said softly. He knew the werewolf's sensitive ears would hear it.
When he got back to the sitting room, he asked: “An hour nap as yesterday?”
“A kiss first, please?” Severus was eager to oblige. He kissed the younger man gently but passionately and then pulled away, “As pleasurable as this is, you have twelve or more hours of work before you.”
“You are right. As usual.” Harry smiled and got up. “It won't be easy to get asleep, though.”
Before the young Healer left through floo they agreed on meeting the next evening at five.
“But only if you get enough sleep before.” Severus insisted.
“It is so nice when someone takes care of me.” Harry smiled shyly.
Then Severus kissed him goodbye and Harry left. Severus had to think about the young man and his affection for Severus. His shy manners and desire to be taken care of. 'We definitely need to have a conversation that won't circle about lycanthrophy.'
ss*hp*ss
“Severus!” Harry said, as he stepped out of the fireplace, eyes shining and a wide smile on his face. The Potions Master embraced him and kissed him hungrily.
“Severus!” Harry moaned into kiss. Severus didn't stop ravishing the pink lips and his hands started wandering around the smaller man's back. Harry pressed his body against Severus' in response and they were both quickly losing all sense of reason.
Severus willed himself to release the irresistible young man. “Harry,” he rasped, his eyes burning with passion, “I never have one night stands.”
“Mmmm?” Harry's brain, clouded with desire, evidently had problems to process the information, “Me neither. What's the point?” he added a little impatiently.
“I want to make love to you. To claim you. I am very possessive about my partners,” Severus said and evidently there was more he wanted to say, but Harry's reaction made him pause.
“Aaah,” Harry moaned, “use that sexy voice one more minute and I am ...oh gods. Severus, kiss me, please.”
“If I kiss you, I won't be able to stop,” Severus warned darkly.
Harry sobered slightly, but his eyes still radiated passion when he said, “Then don't stop. But,” he blushed, “it's been a while, so...”
Severus cut him off with a kiss. “I won't hurt you. I will take care of you. You will scream, but not from pain.”
Harry's breath quickened and he gasped: “Yes, yesss.”
Severus took the smaller man in his arms easily and carried him to his bedroom, in which the only source of light were the flames of a small fireplace. There he placed Harry onto the bed, climbed up next to the younger wizard and kneeled above him. Severus kissed his soon-to-be-lover and quickly undressed them both of their clothing. First Harry's jumper was spelled off, then Severus unbuttoned the upper part of Harry's shirt and paid throughout attention to the tanned throat. Then he tossed off his own robes and eased the collar of his white shirt. Then Severus dealt with the rest of Harry's buttons and stripped him. Severus admired the nearly hairless torso of the younger man and he tasted it with his lips.
Harry was very responsive, moaning and bucking, evidently enjoying himself immensely. He let Severus to lead completely. Something that Severus was very happy about. He was as dominant in bed as anywhere else.
Harry was unusually submissive, though, more than any of his previous lovers had been. Severus had to think about the level of submissiveness that Harry showed. 'Might he want a Master rather than just a lover? ' Harry seemed to validate his suspicions when Severus spelled his own shirt away, too impatient to unbutton it, and the younger man asked him longingly: “Can I touch you?”
Severus decided to follow his instinct and ordered rather than said: “Yes, touch me. Kiss my scars and play with my nipples.” His order was fulfilled immediately. His nipples were stimulated with clever fingers, gently at first and more roughly when he ordered it, and his scars were kissed eagerly.
“Enough.”
The order, given in a low, smooth voice, was obeyed at once, without hesitation. Harry was eyeing him attentively, waiting for what Severus would decide should happen. 'Such a delicious sight.'
Severus kissed Harry and started unbuttoning the younger man's trousers, then pulled off the shorts, freeing Harry's erection, and started playing with it.
Harry moaned loudly, his eyes shut and his hands clenching the silk sheets. “Please,” he moaned with pleasure, “please.” His face was flushed and Severus could see that the young man was close to exploding. Severus stopped stroking Harry and started to explore him with his mouth. First he kissed the head of the hard penis, and then he circled it with his clever tongue a few times. Harry was lost in pleasure, he was panting and sweating and his hips bucked against his will. “Please, Severus,” he begged. The said man smirked smugly and took the penis in his mouth. That was all it took. Harry was shooting and screaming with pleasure, exactly as he had been promised.
Severus embraced his lover and kept him till his breathing evened and he came back from his highs.
“Severus,” Harry whispered, “that was incredible.” Then he lifted his head. But you--“ He blushed. “I am sorry.”
“Let's take a shower together,” Severus suggested and kissed the younger man.
They went into bathroom and Severus stripped the rest of his clothes. Severus spelled the water on and they stepped under the deliciously hot stream. Their lips met again in a slow, sweet kiss. Then Severus pulled away, took the bar of soap and started washing and stroking Harry's body. When he finished, he handed the soap to Harry, who mirrored his actions and soaped first Severus' chest, stroking his scars and his nipples. Then he continued with Severus' neck, moved to his back, then he soaped the Potion Master's long legs and buttocks, and at last paid attention to Severus' hard cock. He washed the erect organ gently and then looked up at Severus' face expectantly.
The older man pulled him into a sound kiss and said a bit hoarsely: “Will you give me pleasure, Harry?”
“Yesss. What do you want me to do, Severus?” Instead of answering Severus laid his hand on Harry's shoulder and pushed down gently. His lover took the hint and kneeled down. He pushed back the foreskin with his gentle fingers and took Severus in his mouth. Severus moaned and tilted his head back under the spray of the water. He felt Harry's clever tongue against the underside of his penis, licking along the vein and he bucked into the mouth that started driving him mad. Harry sucked and Severus moaned and sooner then he would have liked he was climaxing into the sinful mouth. His knees nearly gave out, but Harry held his hips firmly and waited until Severus had recovered from his orgasm.
They were embracing, standing in the shower for a long time, speechless, sated, and happy.
ss*hp*ss
Later, they took dinner in Severus' living room and settled for dessert and tea in the usual black armchairs.
“Harry, as I said, I am interested only in long time relationships,” it was Severus who opened the talk.
The Healer nodded. “It's the same with me. The trust problem, remember?”
Now was Severus' turn to nod. “The intimate moments we shared was as exquisite as unexpected.” He said. “We haven't even had the time to get to know each other.”
“Yeah, I can't believe we've met just a few times. I don't know why it is that I trust you so much. Maybe it's your helping to aid an unknown child, or the way you took care of me. You would hardly care about my sleeping enough if you wanted to do me any harm,” Harry mused.
“Maybe you shouldn't be that trusting.” Severus said with a dark hint in his deep voice.
“Your meaning?” Harry raised an eyebrow with a shadow of uncertainty in his green eyes.
The Potion Master took a deep breath. “Harry, I was a Death Eater,” Severus owned up and prepared himself for the shocked silence, disgust and rejection that were sure to follow.
But Harry just nodded. “I figured as much. I knew it even before I saw that — tattoo in the shower. I felt that your left forearm hurt and I had seen the arms of the few injured Death Eaters I healed with the same tattoo and the same burning pain. I figured it must be some kind of symbol of the bond in the Death Eaters' organisation. Even though their burning was a lot milder than yours,” he added as an afterthought.
Despite the years of spying, Severus' face clearly showed his surprise. He closed his eyes in relief. ‘I know I don't deserve him, but please let me be with him for the rest of my life,' the ex-Death Eater prayed to whatever god who would care to listen to him.
Harry must have seen his distress, because he leaned across the small table between them and petted Severus' hand. Severus took the hand that petted him and kissed it gratefully.
Severus took a deep breath. “I joined when I was seventeen and I soon realised my mistake and started spying for Dumbledore, but,” Severus paused, “it is a poor apology. I joined willingly.”
Harry approached his lover, kneeled before him and embraced him. “Everyone makes mistakes. Not everyone tries to repair them, though.” He whispered.
“I've had to do horrible things. All those years.” The last words were spoken so quietly that they were barely audible.
“You changed your attitude. You decided to do a good thing and you did. You must be very strong to commit crimes against your will and not to let it ruin you. It must have been hard not to start to hate Mr. Dumbledore, not to start to hate yourself. I think that is what attracted me to you. The amazing strength combined with compassion and gentleness.”
Again, Severus was astonished by Harry's empathy and the maturity of his opinions.
“Sometimes I do hate myself,” Severus admitted silently.
“I can stop it, I think. The pain, I mean,” Harry told him gently. “If you let me.”
Severus closed his eyes again. Oh, Merlin, how many times had he wished for the Dark Mark to be erased. Now he was being offered the chance to be rid of the pain, at least. But on the other hand he always considered it a punishment for his foolishness. ‘I know I deserve all of the pain.'
“Severus, stop punishing yourself, please.” Harry surprised Severus once again. “If it's necessary for you to feel the tattoo, I can try to just ease the pain. To a mild prickling for example.”
Severus shook his head. “No, I don't need to feel it. Not anymore.” When he saw the confused expression on the other man's face he explained. “My role as a spy was compromised. I don't need to feel when He summons his followers. And I don't need his punishments.”
“You-Know-Who punishes you through the tattoo? I will examine the bond carefully and then I will stop the burning.” The Healer promised.
“As I said, Healer Potter, there's nothing immature about yourself.” Severus smiled with the mixture of relief, love and sadness.
He was rewarded with a brilliant smile and shining eyes. “Could I stay here tonight?”
ss*hp*ss
Severus was more then willing to comply with Harry's wish to stay overnight. He also agreed that it could be pleasant to lay in bed while they talked about their relationship, their wishes and simply everything they would like to talk about. Severus took Harry's hand and led him to the bedroom. This time he spelled their clothes away, with the exception of underwear, and they climbed on the bed under the dark green satin sheets. They sat against the headboard, propped up against soft pillows and Severus embraced Harry with one hand. They kissed slowly.
“Thank you, Gabrielle,” Harry said in a heartfelt way and then broke into laughter when he saw Severus' bemused expression. “It's-,” he said between the laughing, “the bitten child.” He calmed a bit. “I mean, we would have never met if she wouldn't been bitten.”
“We would have never met if you weren't such a caring Healer,” Severus corrected seriously.
Harry blushed. Then he changed the topic: “I know a nice game. Each person asks one question and the other answers or gives a piece of his clothes. They ask alternately.” His smile was positively mischievous this time.
Severus considered the level of their nakedness and smiled wickedly. “Who starts?” he asked.
“Lets flip a Knut over it decide,” Harry answered and summoned a coin wandlessly. “Dragon or Minister?”
“Dragon, of course,” Severus said with a frown. “It's the worst Minister England ever had.”
Harry threw the coin in the air and let it fall on the dark sheet.
“I start!” Harry smiled. “OK. So... What do you wish for the most of all?”
Severus had to think. 'Nobody ever asks me about my wishes.' Severus tried to remember who asked him what he wished the last time, but failed.
“I think my biggest wish would be for the war to be over and for the Dark lord to be gone for good.
“What do you wish for the most?” He paid back with the question.
“But Severus,” objected Harry, “a question can't be repeated.”
“You didn't include that in the rules,” Severus complained. “Why did you choose me, then?”
“I'd liked you since the first visit here. You are strict and short with people and caring at the same time. I don't know how you manage to do both. Strong. Fully able to protect yourself. Gentle. Understanding. Intelligent. The Master in your chosen subject.” Harry blushed. “Sexy.”
Severus pulled him into a heated kiss. “Nobody is black or white. If you see me as white you will soon leave me in disillusion.”
“No,” Harry hurried to object, “I know you have to have your dark side, as we all do.” He paused. “I, for example, sometimes have a dream where I torture people and let them be bitten by a giant serpent. I have never tortured anyone in my life, well I had to curse rats when I was in training, but— I always hated harming even those.“ He cut himself off. “The fact is,” he whispered, “I can't understand what the meaning of the dreams is. Do I have a repressed wish to harm anyone?”
'Torture and a giant snake?' Alarm bells went off in Severus' head. “It's always hard to tell what dreams present,” he said carefully. “Do you remember any details?”
“Details? Well, I... it's always night there. I probably speak Parseltongue, because I talk to snake and she talks to me.” Worried green eyes turned to Severus. “I know it's a mark of dark wizards.”
“She?” Severus asked.
“She? Oh—Well, I always though about the snake as a female. Weird. Do you think it's connected somehow to my orientation?”
Severus seriously doubted that, but only shrugged. “Do you remember more?”
Harry thought for a minute: “Nothing important. The people kneel before me. Who doesn't kneel I make him to. I call them names. Mudbloods and worse. In reality, I have never had problems with muggleborns. I am a pure blood, but I don't make a fuss about it.” There was a desperate plea in Harry's beautiful eyes and Severus hurried to calm him. “Harry, I don't think anything bad about you because of your dreams. I have a few ideas what it could mean, but I will need to think about it more. We will get back to the dreams tomorrow or the next day.” 'I have to discuss this with Albus. Maybe Remus too. How is that possible? I wonder if more wizards…'
“When were you born?” Severus asked and then reprimanded himself angrily. He didn't want to talk about the prophecy before he had had the chance to think this through.
“In summer,” Harry calmed a bit, “July 31 st . What kind of food do you like when you go out for a dinner?”
Severus remembered they were playing the game, relieved. “I like Italian food for example.” “I love pizza,” Harry beamed. “We could go to an Italian restaurant some night.”
“Harry, I am sorry, but we can't go to a restaurant. The Dark lord and his followers are after me. I am staying at Hogwarts all the time.” He paused.
Harry nodded, “Of course, I should have thought about it. I can bring a pizza some day.” He smiled and tilted his head towards Severus, as if he wanted to kiss him, but he didn't. The gesture helped Severus to remember what he wanted to ask.
ss*hp*ss
Severus was lying on his back, warm, sated and holding the young beauty in his arms. He couldn't sleep. This was too precious and he wanted to enjoy their first, and hopefully not last, night together. Now that he knew what he could have, he didn't think he would be able to live without it again.
Of its own volition, his mind returned to Harry's shy and carefully worded expectations of what their relationship could do for him. And Severus promised himself again that he would do his best to keep Harry happy.
“I need to feel safe with my partner. Both to trust him and to trust he is able to protect me. I must decide quickly and infallibly at work and I can relax the best when someone decides instead of me at home.” At this Severus smiled reassuringly.
“But I don't want be a servant or a slave,” Harry hurried to add. “I don't want to be bossed around and trained or punished or even tried to be broken.” He had frowned in disgust.
Severus asked him curiously: “Somebody tried?”
“Well, yes. One of my partners was trying to make me a sub. I was too young to understand what he was doing and I couldn't have understood what he wanted from me, why he was giving me illogic orders and such….” He shook his head. “I was so stupid.”
“How old were you?”
“Sixteen. It happened during summer holidays before my sixth year.”
Severus tensed as the anger rose in him again. If he had the bastard in his hands, he would be very sorry. What a sick man he had to be to try to force a child into such a delicate kind of relationship? Severus looked at the sleeping young man in his arms and made a vow to himself that he would protect him against all the dangers in the world. His thoughts drifted back to their earlier conversation.
Severus could feel his anger rising. “Harry,” he forced himself to speak calmly, “Before partners start to do anything that is not widely common, they have to talk about it and each one of them must explain what his expectations, needs and limits are. A Dominance and submission relationship can be as nice as any other. But both partners must enter it willingly and have the possibility to leave on their will.”
“And you,” Harry asked hesitantly, “would like to have this kind of relationship?”
Severus decided to answer honestly. “Harry, I am a dominant partner. I won't force you to do anything, I won't try to train you or break you. But I am used to make decisions and to lead. I will require every important decision to be at least consulted with me.”
When Harry just nodded in agreement and didn't object to anything, Severus added:
“I participated in a Master and servant relationship and it was very pleasant for me and my servant too. However, it was pleasant precisely for the reason that he wanted to be a sub and I wanted to be his Master.”
“If it was pleasant for the both, why did it end?” Harry asked after a few moments.
“He died.” Severus closed his eyes and anticipated the well known pang of sorrow, but all he felt was sadness, the pain had finally eased. He felt a warm gentle hand on his arm, opened his eyes and smiled. “It was years ago.”
“You still miss him.”
Severus shook his head. “I will never forget him. But he is the past and I've moved on. None of my later relationships was of a Master and servant kind, so you don't have to be concerned that I would try to pressure you into such a partnership.“
Harry shook his head. “I don't fear it.”
Harry might not fear Severus mistreating him but the older man himself was afraid, afraid that he would misread Harry's actions or hints. Afraid that he would unconsciously do something that would drive the younger man away. The younger man whose body fitted so nicely in his arms. Severus kissed the sleeping man's hair gently. He hoped he had explained the need to communicate well to Harry.
“You must help me in finding the balance, Harry,” Severus said, “In making decisions I may give you orders or I can expect you to do something, but if you feel uncomfortable with it or feel as if I am ‘bossing you around', you have to let me know. In actions or words, you have to tell me how you feel about it. You have to convey to me how much you want to be in control, both at home and when making love.” Severus looked at his lover seriously: “For example from some of your responses during our lovemaking I would have guessed you are a sub. If I were to act without talking to you, I might treat you wrongly, because I had misread your responses.”
The younger man kissed him. “I love you for this, for the thoughtfulness, for not minding to talk about things,” Harry said. He paused and then admitted slowly, “Maybe I might be a bit submissive. I don't know, actually. Maybe I used to be but he spoiled it.” He thought for a moment. “I liked it when you ordered me to touch you.”
“We can explore it. We will find what you like the best,” Severus kissed the man sitting beside him and gasped when two green shining eyes turned to him, filled with love. Love and passion.
“When do you plan to start the exploration?” Harry asked seductively.
Severus didn't waste his time with a response and started to explore wants and needs of his lover properly.
ss*hp*ss
When Severus woke up, he was still holding Harry, who was still in a deep sleep. He leisurely stoked the soft, unruly hair. He hardly ever idled, but now he thought he could get used to it. Severus savoured the moments before it was time to get out of the warm bed and face the day.
“Harry,” he tried to wake the Healer, “it's six ‘o clock, you need to get up.”
“Mmmm,” was the only answer he received.
“Get up,” Severus insisted, “or you won't be able to have breakfast before you have to leave.”
This time the only response was a light shifting under the blankets near their waists. A very aroused Harry kissed Severus' nipple, which presented itself just before his face and softly said in a cuddly voice: “Breakfast is not my greatest need right now.”
“You have twelve hours of incessant work before you. You will hardly have time to have a proper meal there,” the older man said in a no-nonsense voice.
“Please, Severus. Please,” Harry begged and Severus growled. ‘How could I resist this temptation? I am only human.' He shifted above Harry, pinned him down with his body and kissed him passionately. Their kiss heated more and more while their naked bodies were rubbing against each other. Harry was soon moaning constantly. Severus was less vocal but a few moans escaped him as well. The pace of rubbing quickened until they both were gasping for breath. “Severus... Severus... I wish you were inside me right now.” Harry panted and exploded between their bellies. Severus imagined himself buried deeply in his lover and the picture got him over the edge too.
They relaxed and after a few minutes Severus took his wand and cleaned them. “Get up. We can still have a quick breakfast.”
Harry was eating fried bacon and eggs with a healthy appetite, Severus was sipping his black tea and delicately eating a roll.
“Harry, the scar on your back, in a shape of a flash, how long have you had it?” Severus asked casually.
“Since childhood.” Harry started ravishing a piece of apple pie. “I love the house elves of Hogwarts.”
“Does it hurt?” Severus asked in the same tone.
“Hurt? No, no it doesn't. Why do you ask?” It prickled Harry's curiosity.
“It might— But it's nearly time to leave, let's talk about it in the evening.” Severus suggested.
Harry nodded and got up. “I have to pop home in the evening, but would it be okay if I came here for the night? I would come around ten,” Harry asked a bit uncertainly.
Severus drew him close and kissed him: “Of course, you will be very welcome.”
Harry smiled and stepped into the fireplace.
ss*hp*ss
“So, the dreams, his birthday and the scar. Too many signs for it to be a coincidence.” Severus summed up the main facts after telling Albus all the information and surviving all the annoying twinkling in the Headmaster's eyes over Severus' confession about the nature of his and Harry's relationship.
The old man was deep in thought. “It could still be a coincidence.” Severus snorted. “But I agree with you, he very likely is the One who, according to the prophecy, is able to kill Voldemort.”
Severus winced when he heard the name, but said only: “Thankfully he is not a Dark Lord supporter.”
“Yes,” Albus nodded, “And thankfully once more, he has a warrior's training. We need to have a chat with him. Is he coming to your quarters tonight?”
Severus hated himself for blushing slightly. He cleared his throat: “Yes, but he has some things to do and won't come until about ten in the evening.”
“Ask him to come earlier tomorrow, please, and if he is busy too, bring him tonight. The matter is too serious to be delayed.”
Severus nodded and left, his spirits gloomy.
He was worried. Worried about Harry, the Healer who was used to cure wounds and ease pains, who would soon be explained he was probably supposed to kill someone to protect everyone else. Harry, who doubted his own character because of a few dreams. Harry, who was unwilling to kill even such animals as rats. Severus was also worried about their relationship. 'If he survives, he may start to hate himself. Hate Albus. Hate me.'
The parallel to Harry's words came quickly, naturally and it mercilessly foretold the future.
'I knew this was too good to last.' Severus thought bitterly and wondered how many days or hours of happiness were left. He feared they were less than a few.
All Potion students developed a sense for their teacher's mood. Today they were very subdued and everyone watched Snape carefully. This mood was new and they feared what it could bring them.
ss*hp*ss
The Potion Master was marking essays during his always-student-less consulting hours. He was still feeling anxious about their future, but couldn't help himself to feel joy that Harry would come in some six hours.
Suddenly, a brilliant pain shot trough his left forearm. Severus screamed. He fell of the chair, curled in on himself, a slave to the blinding pain. When the shock left him and his nerve system recovered, he realised the constant burning of the mark had gone.
He climbed on the chair a bit stiffly and rolled up his left sleeve gingerly. The mark was gone. He stared at his forearm dumfounded. He knew he should feel victorious, but all he found in himself was emptiness. Then he snapped his head up. ‘Does that mean that Harry is not the One? Or is he...' Severus throat constricted as a wave of panic washed over him. ‘Has something happened to him?!' Severus knew he should go and try to contact the German Healing Centre, but he felt as if his limbs didn't belong to him anymore.
“Sir,” a breathless young student ran into Severus' classroom, “Sir, Headmaster Dumbledore asks you to come to his office. Immediately, sir, he said.”
Severus stood quickly, and locked the classroom carefully before he hurried along dungeon corridors. ‘What, the hell could have happened?'
ss*hp*ss
“Severus,” Dumbledore welcomed him with a broad smile.
Severus felt as if a heavy burden had been lifted from his shoulders. A hesitant spark of hope shone in his black eyes. No matter how crazy Albus was, he wouldn't smile if Severus' lover had died.
“Has something happened to Harry?”
“He will be fine, my boy, with your help he will be fine.”
“Dammit! Don't be cryptic, Albus,” the younger man spat, his nerves on edge.
The Headmaster shoved a bowl full of floo powder into the Potion Master's hands: “The St. Merlin's Healing Centre, Germany, Healers' floo room, Severus.”
Severus obeyed trustfully. He called the destination and stepped out of the floo in a small room, empty with the exception of the fireplace.
“Who arrived?” Severus could hear a man's voice shouting through the doors and, undoubtedly, wards.
“Severus Snape, the Potion Master, the Potion teacher at Hogwarts, England.” Severus shouted back.
The door opened and a slim woman in white Healer's clothes came in. “Hello, Professor. I am Heidi Brennen. Follow me, please.” Her voice was pleasant, even with the German accent.
She nodded to the door warden and she and Severus walked quickly through a corridor.
The Healer explained: “Harry was repeating the name ‘Severus'. We knew he had contacted you because of a patient. As far as we know Harry doesn't know another man of the name. That's why we called Hogwarts. Thank you for your coming, sir. Through this door.”
“What happened?” Severus stopped her.
“Harry killed You-know-who. He broke down afterwards,” she said and opened the door.
They stepped into a white room with a large window showing the darkness outside. Three of the four beds were unoccupied and Severus hurried to a sobbing figure curled up into ball on the last bed.
“Harry,” he whispered and wondered if Harry would allow anyone to touch him. “Harry, can I touch you?”
He didn't get an answer except for the nearly inaudible ‘Severus' that Harry still kept repeating between sobs. Severus looked at Heidi Brennen questioningly. She nodded.
“Harry,” Severus repeated and stroked his unruly hair slowly. He sat on the bed beside his lover, still caressing the hair and looked at two vials on the nightstand beside Harry's bed. It was a calming and a sleeping draught.
“Did he take it?” he asked the young woman.
“No, we didn't want to force him, as he usually refuses calming potions, and he hasn't communicated,” she said quickly. “If you manage to calm him down, give him the sleeping potion afterwards, please. If he doesn't calm down in about an hour, let him digest both of them, please. If you need a hand, come and find me. I have to go to check on other patients now. At seven night Healers will arrive and I will tell you what happened here, if you want,” she offered.
Severus nodded gratefully and the Healer left.
Severus moved his stroking hand to Harry's arms and back and after a long time he could see the younger man was slowly calming down. Severus lifted Harry and positioned him on his lap. Harry buried his face in Severus cloak and let the older man to nurse him.
Severus kept stroking Harry's back in calming circles and whispered encouragingly into his ear. He didn't speak about the death of the Dark Lord and didn't try to persuade Harry it wasn't anyone's fault. He whispered about his love for Harry and about their future together that Severus would love to share.
The young man in his lap stilled finally and after a while Severus was sure Harry was half asleep. He lay him down and in Harry's slumber Severus lifted the younger man's head and poured the sleeping draught down his throat carefully.
Severus made sure Harry was comfortable and warm under the white blankets and went to find Healer Brennen.
ss*hp*ss
Severus found the Healers' room, but there he discovered it was nearly midnight. Healer Brennen had been off duty for hours and the present Healer didn't know much more than Severus himself did.
“Heidi told me that You-Know-Who had come here with three Death Eaters and they wanted the staff to go with them,” the Healer explained with a strong accent, “Harry was in the children's part of the Centre. The other two Healers on duty had already been captured.
When they came on Harry's floor, they attacked children, which infuriated Harry terribly. Heidi said he had been scary, he blew off and killed all of them in an instant.”
The Healer shook his head, “Until today I believed Harry was the most peaceful man on Earth.” He paused and then mused: “They shouldn't have attacked the kids. Harry loves them.”
Severus went back to the room where his lover was sleeping peacefully. He stripped out of his black robes and lay down on the bed, crawling under the covers and drawing Harry's warm, relaxed body into his arms.
ss*hp*ss
“S- Severus?”
Severus woke up. “Harry.” He noted Harry was calmer, but there was an awful lot of pain and, to Severus' surprise, fear in the green eyes.
“They-” Harry shook his head as if to prevent the tears that formed in his eyes from falling. “They told you, right?”
“They told me basic facts, Harry.” Severus wiped away the tears. “Sssh, calm down.”
“You didn't leave,” the young Healer whispered unbelievingly.
That caught Severus by surprise. ”Why do you suppose I would leave?”
“Hans— is dead.” Harry lost his fragile balance and started to cry in earnest, curling into ball again.
'Hans?' Severus thought, confused. Until now he was sure Harry was feeling guilty for killing the four sadistic perverts, which Severus would have explained very quickly to be a very positive thing, but... 'It couldn't have been a Death-Eater.' It simply didn't make any sense. Then he got it. 'A child. Oh, Merlin!'
“Harry. Harry!” Severus drew the miserable young man close. “Harry, calm down, please. Harry, please, love, look at me,” he pleaded again and again.
Finally the distraught young man turned to him, sobbing, and Severus handed him the vial with a calming potion from the nightstand. “Drink,” he ordered.
Harry downed the vial without question. They lay for a few minutes until Harry had quietened.
“I am here and I am not leaving you. I promised to take care of you and I wish nothing more than to keep my word.” Severus said in his most rigorous yet gentle voice, which had only been heard by a handful of Slytherins so far.
Harry clung tightly to Severus, his grip nearly bruising, and held on to him like an anchor. Severus embraced him tightly. “If you feel up to discussing this I would like to know more. It would be easier to discuss it properly. But you don't have to if you don't want to.”
They sat in silence for long minutes and then Harry sighed and said weakly: “There is not much to discuss. I was in the Children's Ward and they came and Heidi and Teresa were in ropes and they shouted and I couldn't...” Harry started to cry again, and Severus let him, just holding Harry in his arms he waited until the silent sobbing stopped.
“I should have fought them immediately. I knew I should fight. But I... me... and the dreams... it all--” Harry was breathing heavily and Severus doubted he would learn anything more.
Only a moment before he could suggest cancelling the discussion of such a painful topic for now, Harry started to talk again. “I was so afraid that I was bad person, for wanting to fight, I hesitated. And—” He paused again. “And they started to fire spells and hexes and Hans— It's all my fault. I failed them,” he finished his discontinuous narrative.
“It wasn't your fault.” Severus took Harry's chin gently and lifted his head, so that Harry had to look into his dark eyes. “Dark Lord who attacked the Centre with his followers is at fault here.”
“But—”Severus' raised hand stopped Harry before he could complete the protest.
“You may not have acted as you were taught to during your warrior training, that is true. But on the other hand, you don't know what would have happened if you had started to fight immediately.”
The young Healer wanted to say something, but Severus stopped him again.
“I was told that you killed the four of them in an instant. Without being furious, would you be able to accomplish it?”
“I— No. Probably not.” Severus' heart broke when he saw the look of a desperate hope in the green eyes.
“So, what would have happened then,” Severus invited.
“We would have fought-”
“With an uncertain result,” Severus finished the sentence instead of his beloved.
Harry cuddled up to the older man again, more relaxed now. Severus hoped that it was result of their discussion, not just of the calming draught. The Potion Master knew he had a lot to explain to Harry. The vague prophecy about One man who was the only one able to stop the Dark Lord, the years of looking for the One and the repeated failures, and many other things.
Someone knocked on the door.
“Enter!” Severus called.
Heidi Brennen came into the room and smiled at the two of them in the bed. Severus felt he was blushing.
“Harry, I know it's still before breakfast, but Hans pleaded to see you.”
Harry slowly untangled from Severus' embrace, his face showing clearly disbelief and hope. “Hans?” He rasped.
“Yes, Hans.” She smiled broadly. “It was close, but he is okay now. Without any permanent damage.”
Harry stared at her for a minute and then darted from the bed and ran out of the door.
ss*hp*ss
“Harry, tell me what you want.” Severus hoped his longing wasn't too clear in his voice, as he didn't want to push the younger man into anything he didn't want.
They lay once again in the green sheeted bed in the Potion Master's chambers, later
that day, naked and aroused.
“Take me, Severus,” Harry answered passionately and those were the sweetest words Severus could have hoped to hear.
The older man watched Harry intently, looking for a slightest sign of doubts, but didn't find any. “I won't let you go. Ever,” Severus rasped and started to prepare his lover for their first joining.
“Never leave me, never,” Harry pleaded and the end of the sentence was difficult to understand as it was mixed with a moan.
Severus teased the pink nipple again to elicit more of the delicious sounds. Then he slowly moved down to the flat stomach, his hand caressing Harry's buttocks.
“Lay on your back,” Severus ordered and his lover was eager to obey.
Severus summoned a lubricating balm and his clever hands started their work. One of them was stroking Harry's member softly, slowly, the other, greasy with the lubricant, encircling Harry's pink opening the same pace. Slowly, the older man eased one finger inside the tight anus. He worked slowly, patiently, and only when Harry's moans intensified, another finger was pressed inside.
Severus took Harry into his mouth, stroking him gently with his tongue, and his fingers were carefully stretching the tight heat. Harry was breathing heavily and when Severus found the sweet spot inside, Harry reared up and exploded into Severus' mouth.
“Sorry, too much,” Harry said hoarsely when he had recovered slightly.
“Don't apologise,” Severus kissed him and started to move the fingers again.
When Severus added a third finger and was on the verge of going mad with lust, Harry whispered: “Please, Severus.”
Severus eased himself into the tight heaven and it was only thanks to his incredible self-control that he didn't climax immediately. He buried himself completely and stopped. He kissed Harry and said the words he had never believed he would say aloud: “I love you.”
Then he started to move and Harry moaned. Severus stroked his lover's renewed erection quickly, as he felt he wouldn't last long. He quickened the pace and soon they were both brought to the climax.
“Thank you, Gabrielle.” Severus said when he got back to his senses. And Harry burst out laughing.
Severus had stopped to believe he would ever be happy so many years ago. But then Harry had come into his life and everything had changed. Forever.
*the end*
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