I don't know about a tasty story (still working on "Merry Christmas Spock"... preTos), but more of an idea...

If anyone wants to have a go...

Kirk dressed as Santa, challenges Spock to sit on his knee and tell Santa what he wants for Christmas...

Right-o, let's see....

"Jim, I do not understand. *Why* do you want me to sit on your lap?"

"Because -- I'm Santa, and it's Christmas, and you've been a good boy, so it's time for you to sit on Santa's lap and tell him what you want for Christmas."

"But Jim -- I do not understand -- this is highly illogical. Surely you do not believe in this old legend?"

(Human sigh)

"Spock -- please, just humour me, t'hy'la. Will you do that? I promise, I'll make it worth your while!"

(Silence.)

(More silence.)

"Jim, *please*. You are pouting again."

"Hmf. Last time, you said I looked cute when I did this."

(Patient Vulcan sigh.)

"Very well. But I still do not understand." (Rustling sounds, muffled human 'oof!') "There. I am sitting on your lap." (Sound of human wheezing.) "But Jim -- am I not too heavy? Vulcan tissue is more dense than huma--mmf!"

(Lots of kissing noises.)

"There. Now *that's* more like it. Silly Vulcan. I *told* you it'd be worth your while."

(Kissing noises, sound of Vulcan gasping for air.)

"You, Jim, are -- ah! -- incorrigible."

(More kissing noises, odd little rustles.)

"Mmm-hm. And *you*, Mr. Spock, are a shameless sensualist." (Rustle, rustle.)

"Ahh... If I am, it is *you* who make me so, t'hy'la."

(Licking noises, rustles, heavy breathing.)

"Jim!"

"Sshh... you're lovin' every minute of this. I can tell." (Hands, moving on cloth. More rustling, louder licking noises.)

"Ohh... oh, Jim..."

(Muffled chuckle, more licking. Stifled Vulcan gasp.)

"Mmmm. You taste *good*, t'hy'la."

"And *you*..."

(Rustles. Weight shifting, chair creaking.)

"Oh! Oooh, Spock, that's..." (Sound of human gasp.)

"Mmm?" (Slurp!)

"Oh... oh, *yes*! Here. Just a sec--" (Another creak. Zipper noises. Vulcan gasp.)

"Jim... I -- I think, perhaps, we should move now..."

(More heavy breathing.)

"Mmmm." (More kisses, a moan or two) "Oh, I don't know. Let me see. Now, if I can just unsnap *this*, and slide *this* out of the way..."

(More rustles. A surprised gasp; more heavy breathing. Happy moans.)

"Ah!"

(Assorted rustles, kisses, a loud gasp.)

"Yesss... ooh, *yeah*, uh-huh, that's it... Rock back and forth, Spock... Oh!"

(Sliding noises. Wet noises. More kissing.)

"Jim... ah, Jim, Jim, Jim..."

(Swishes, rustles. More wet noises. LOTS of heavy breathing. Ominous creak, of chair at breaking point)

"Uh-oh... Spock, I'm starting to--"

(Loud THUMP!)

"Ouch! *Dammit*!! Hey... Spock? Are you all right? Spock?" (Rustles. Sound of remains of chair being tossed aside.)

(Soft moan.) "T'hy'la -- my head hurts..."

"Ooh, yeah, I bet. Wow. That's quite a bump. Mmm. Here. Better let me kiss it better, before we get up, ok?" (Rustles. Kissing noises)

"Jim, what is 'kiss it better'? I do not underst--mmmf!"

(Impatient human takes matters into own hands type sounds)

(And awaaay we go again.)

********

Mele kalikimaka, y'all!!

> Have a great day/evening
> Sharone.