Author:  Marag

Title:     Once Upon A Time

Rating:  R

Pairing:  Clark/Lex

Summary:           Once beneath the stars
                          The universe was ours
                          Love was all we knew
                          And all I knew was you
                          I wonder if you know
                          I wonder if you think about it
                          Once upon a time
                          In your wildest dreams
Disclaimer: Not an American, but I do like the 1^st amendment, and as such (to paraphrase Warren Zevon) I respond to C&D's with Lawyers Guns and Money.

Feedback address: clearasmud@sympatico.ca

Author's Notes: This will some day be finished.  Answers the challenge for Song Fic, with no lyrics involved. Futurefic
Beta: Terpsichore

ONCE UPON A TIME

Once upon a time a pretty lady went into a flower shop.  Inside she met a nasty witch, but she also met a fairy princess.

The Princess told the lady to close her eyes and make a wish and whatever she wished for would come true.

The pretty lady closed her eyes and wished really, really hard.  She smiled and thanked the Fairy Princess, then left the flower shop to go home.

Along the way the skies darkened, the heavens opened, and it began to rain fire.

It was then, in a moment of terror and destruction, the Fates smiled down upon the pretty lady, and her most cherished wish was granted.

****

No little boy in the galaxy was ever as loved as Clark Kent.

Martha didn't know why his parents had sacrificed him to the heavens, but whatever their reasons or wherever they were, she hoped that somehow they knew how much she treasured her son.

Life was hard.  There were problems, but there was also love. Secrets are never easy, but somehow they managed.

But all fairy tales have to have a tragic element. 

What began in a cornfield nearly ended the day a man drove his car off a bridge.

The man should have died, but a hero saved him.

But that was also the day the young hero learned he had fallen from the sky; a gift from a fairy princess.

It was a while before Clark was able to go to his parents and ask them why.

Why was he here?  Why had they never told him?  Why...?  So many questions...

They had no answers.

 
It changed him.  Secrets are never easy.

 
There were hard times after that.  The hero's father was an angry man and he let his anger spill over onto his son.

But time is an amazing thing.

Life settled down; there were good times and tragic ones.

Martha watched as her son grew.  Watched, and worried as he tried to cope with changes, and with lies.

For a while Martha wondered if her son and the fairy princess might find a happy ever after of their own. 

But there was always something missing; even Martha could see that.

And then; when no one was really paying attention, our hero fell deeply and forever in love.

Clark never told anyone about his love; but a mother knows these things.  She hurt for and with her son but there was little she could do. 

She knew that the fates demanded a price; she had suspected what that price would be the day the heavens wept, and her son from the sky met a son of the earth.

Life went on, and for three years all was well.  Then one day due to an odd quirk of fate, the one that Clark loved realised that he was so loved.

Knowing changed Lex forever. 

Clark loved him; if someone as special as Clark could love him, then maybe he was worth loving. 

Maybe, just maybe, he could learn to love himself.

He was so happy, so joyous in the knowledge that he forgot to be cautious.

He came to Clark, desperate for Clark to know that the deep and forever love was returned ten fold.

But instead of joy, there was great anguish.  

Clark's father saw the man and was very, very angry.  He demanded that Clark choose.

Clark looked at the man he loved as a father and the man that he loved above all others and cried tears of great pain.  He turned to his mother but she could offer no words of wisdom.  There was no fairy princess to help this time.

And when the pain of the lies and a choice he should never have been asked to make became too much for him to bear; Clark ran away.

 

*****
 

"Lex?"

"Pete, come in. I was hoping you'd stop by.  All packed?"

"Lex, can I ask you a question and get a straight answer?"

Lex turned his head away for a moment, but then looked directly at Pete.  "You've more than earned that right."

"Am I going to University on your ticket?"

"The first time you won't let me prevaricate and you ask me the one question that demands it. Alright, is Luthor money funding your education? Yes, but you have earned every single dime of that scholarship money, and if you don't keep your grades up you'll lose it - just like anyone else."

Pete looked at Lex and wondered when, exactly they had become friends.  "I won't let you down Lex."

"You haven't yet."

*****

"The ship is gone."

"What?"

"I just checked the cellar, and it's gone.  Do you think there is any way it could have been Lex?"

Martha looked at her husband.  "No.  We both know that it couldn't be.  And there is no way that Pete would have moved it without telling us.  Is the tablet gone?"

"It's not where Clark used to keep it."

"Well that answers your question, Clark was here."

"I can't believe he is still that angry.  With me maybe, but to come here and not see you?  No, it couldn't have been Clark.  Do you think Pete told Lex?"

Martha closed her eyes.  "No, but I think it's long past time we did."

He glared at her. "Are you insane?"

Martha stood up and headed for the stairs.  "No.  Maybe I'm thinking clearly for the first time in years."

Jonathan was openly furious, but Martha didn't make the drive to the castle alone.

*****

"Harvard Law?  Pete, forget letting me down; you've managed to impress me."

"I've impressed a Luthor?  Sure sign of the Apocalypse."

"Ass.  Have you told Chloe yet?"

"I would if I could get hold of her.  Where the hell is she?"

"Harassing my investigators no doubt.  They've become so tired of her unofficial help that they've offered her a summer job.  The theory is it'll be good training for an investigative journalist, but I think they just wanted the pretence of being able to control her."

"I suddenly feel better.  If anyone can find him it's Chloe."

*****

"Lex?  Are you in here?"

Lex looked down from the loft in his office and watched Martha for a moment before making his presence known.  She had aged in the last few years.  Oddly enough, it was her job with Lionel that had kept her sane.

At least until his dad had stopped hiring executives and had begun gathering minions.

"Up here Martha."

"I got your message."

Lex slowly came down the stairs and walked over to where she stood.  He took her hands into his.  "I need to talk to you.  I've done all I can do, but I can't run LeXcorp from Smallville any longer.  I'm going to have to move to Metropolis full time."

Martha smiled sadly, "Oh Lex, you've stayed longer than you should have.  Maybe the move to Metropolis will be good all around.  Maybe it's time for you..."

One finger gently stilled her words.  "Martha, we both know that I will never "move-on".  Lex sighed and moved away from her.  "I plan to keep the castle open and staffed.  I've transferred controlling interest in the Talon over to Lana, but on the condition that the doors stay open.  There will always be a light on.  Always."

Martha was glad Lex's back was turned; she didn't want to see the pain in his eyes.  "I know Lex, I know."

*****

Pete Ross/ Chloe Sullivan/ Lex Luthor.  An unlikely trio, but after Clark disappeared, the three of them had clung together, hating each other, needing each other and finally loving each other in a friendship built on a foundation of sheer need. 

Lex attended Pete's graduation from Harvard Law; job offer in hand.  Pete accepted, and Lex named Gabe Sullivan Chief of Operations.

Pete Ross had proven to be a superb legal advisor; a better executive assistant; and a good, true friend.  

Life went on.

*****

Chloe burst through the doors and into the middle of a meeting with the top executives from seven Fortune 500 companies.  

"I found him."

Lex stood up instantly. "Please excuse me; I need to attend to this." Not caring in the slightest about the host of confused and angry looks he was receiving, Lex walked out of the room without a backward glance. 

The first time Bruce Wayne had met him, Lex Luthor had been a child hiding in the closet to avoid the hell that was the annual Luthor Christmas Party. 

He had no idea who the lady with the wild hair was, but whatever her message meant; it had put life back into Lex's eyes for the first time in many, many years.

He made sure that the others stayed.

*****

"The New York Times?"

"Nothing quite like hiding in plain sight."

"Okay, so he's been hired based on a Journalism degree we both know he doesn't have.  Apprentice to Lois Lane, and she's your cousin?"

"Irony sucks doesn’t it?"

"Give me the rest."

"He's made no secret of his reappearance.  He wanted to be found.  He's sharing an apartment with Lois."

Lex poured himself a drink, but then set it down.  "They're lovers?"

"It's a two bedroom apartment, and Lois had male roommates all through school.  Lex..."

"Are.  They.  Lovers?"

"I have no idea.  There are rumours, but knowing Lois...  Honestly Lex, I doubt it."

Lex looked at the scotch for a long time.

*****

"It's him."

"Lex, we can't be sure?"

"An Alien Superhero?  I hate to dwell on the obvious but who the hell else could it be?"

Pete looked at Lex, and then looked away, unable to bear the pain he saw in the other man's eyes.  "Yeah, I suppose.  Well, so much for keeping a low profile.  Do you think he'll come home now?"

"I don't know.  I guess I should touch base with Martha.  Maybe I'll go out to Smallville for a visit.  It's been awhile."

"Lex, if you break another date with Suzan she is going to dump you; no doubt publicly."

"She has been somewhat understanding so far."

"She's still hoping you'll put out."

"Pete..."

"Sorry, I know, forbidden territory, but Lex - maybe you should."

"I'm not going to cheat on Clark.  I'm going to go call Martha."

Pete sighed, knowing that this conversation would lead to nothing but a fun-filled weekend of Lex trying to drink himself into oblivion.   "You want me...?"

"No.  But thank you for offering."

*****

They’d never made love.

They'd come close, necking in the barn; passionate, stolen moments at the Castle.   But Lex, ever the romantic, wanted more for Clark than silent groping in the loft.  He wanted to make love to Clark but more than that, he wanted to be able to hold him after, to wake up beside him.

Lex wanted forever.

He'd remained faithful until the day he'd learned about Lois.  That night he'd gone to a club and picked up the first woman who'd appealed to him.  That she'd had dark curly hair and eyes the same colour as Clark's was a complete coincidence.  

He never knew her name. He never asked.  He didn't kiss her, he just fucked her, hard and fast and with his eyes shut tight.

He never cheated on Clark again.

They'd never made love.

It was his biggest regret.

*****

Lois Lane sat on her new sofa and watched Clark as he stared out the window of her new apartment.   She had nothing to offer him but words.  "We can still back out."

Clark didn't answer.

Words, how little they meant sometimes.  "Clark, please talk to me?  Tell me I didn't force this on you?"

Clark sighed but didn't turn from the window.  "No, you didn't.  It was time."

"Clark?  Please?"

Another sigh, but this time he turned and came to sit with her.  "Lois, you're my closest friend, but I wouldn't do this just for you.  I have to deal with it eventually; I have to grow up."

"Are you going to see Lex?"

"No."

"Clark..."

"NO!  Lois I can't.  I love him more now than the day I last saw him.  If I see him, I'll never have the strength to leave again."

"Okay explain to me slowly exactly why this is a bad thing?"

"How do you think he'd react to Big Blue?  Fifteen years of lying Lois, five of them to his face.  I don't think he'd be able to forgive that."

"Chloe told me he has never stopped loving you."

"One thing I learned early on; with Lex Luthor, you only get one chance.  I blew that chance a long time ago Lois and even Superman can't turn back time."

"He loves you.  Love is about second chances."

"Love is about faith and truth and honestly.  I was never honest with him, I never told him the truth, and I didn’t have enough faith in his love to even try to explain.  If he loves me, it's a habit."

"Love isn't like smoking.  It isn't a light switch you can turn on or off at will."

"Yeah... I know."

Lois gathered her friend into her arms and wished - not for the first time - that she could simply fix this with the wave of a magic wand.

*****

Lex didn't bother to look up when the door to his office opened.  "What is it Pete?"

"It's not Pete."

"Chloe?"

"Hi Lex."

Lex stood up and walked over to his guest.  For a second he seemed uncertain then he gathered her into a tight hug.  "You have news."

She didn't reply, she simply handed Lex a copy of the Daily Planet.  The article was small, and it was below the fold, but it was on the front page.  "The Planet is proud to announce we have lured the hot young writing team of Lois Lane and Clark Kent to Metropolis, they will be joining the action team starting Monday..."

Lex looked up at Chloe and wondered for a moment why he was sitting on the floor. "Did you know?"

"Perry told us this morning.  It was all a big surprise."

Lex reached for his cell and hit the first number on his speed dial.  He prayed Martha would be the one to answer.

"Hello?"

"Mr Kent? He's coming home?"

"Not quite.  He came to see us yesterday.  Martha is on her way to see you. She felt you should be told in person."

"And you?"

"He wouldn't speak to me Lex. He gave Martha a letter addressed to you."

Jonathan hung up without saying goodbye.  Lex wondered why he heard the word clearly anyway.

*****

Lex secretly loved the movie Casablanca.

His favourite scene was where Rick stood on the platform, reading Elsa's letter as the rain washed away the fateful words. That scene always made him so sad.

He was reminded of it as he sat reading Clark's letter over and over.

"Dear Lex:
 

I know you searched for me those first few years, and I know how hard you've worked to keep track of me, making sure I knew that your door was always open...

That knowledge got me through some very rough times, and I will always be so grateful to you for that.

I know you want to see me, but there is something that you have to understand, the Clark Kent you knew in Smallville is dead, and I have to leave him in the past. 

You don't forgive easily but even if you could, I don't think I could ever forgive myself.

I am sorry I didn't have enough faith in us to come to you.  But the past is done.  You've moved on, and it's long past time for me to deal with things.

I can't see you.  Now or ever.   It's still too raw Lex. I’m sorry.  I guess I'm still a child, but I can't go back to being your friend.

If it means anything to you, I am indescribably proud of the way you and LeXcorp are dealing with Lionel.

I wanted you to know that you were always my choice.  I have loved you every moment of every day and I will continue to do so for the rest of my life.

Clark."

Lex read the letter again; watching the words blur, and wondered when it had started raining in his bedroom.

*****

Chloe tossed the paper down in disgust.  "Another front page special.  Lionel is not going to be pleased."

Pete sighed, wishing he could simply drink himself stupid and forget all about Lionel Luthor.  "Lex is the one who tipped off Lois.  His hands were shaking when he made the call - I can't say for sure if he was hoping that Clark would answer the phone, or praying he wouldn't."

"I wish that Lex could move on."

"What?  Meet the man of his dreams?  He tried that, except the man of his dreams turned out to be a moron."

"I wish I could fix this.  I miss him.  I miss both of them."

"Me too babe, me too."

*****

Lois sat on the roof of her apartment building and waited.

"Lois?  Are you waiting up for me?" 

The deep voice behind her made her smile.  "Of course I am.  I figured you'd be late."  She held up the thermos of coffee she had been holding.  "I was tempted to lace it with something after this morning."

Superman took the offered flask and flashed a grateful smile.  "It wasn't that bad.  What I don't understand is how Metropolis seems to need me more than New York City did."

"That was only gangs and thugs and Russians... nothing to compare to Lionel Luthor."

Clark managed a smile.  "You've got a point."

The smile suddenly dropped off Clark's face.  He looked first angry, then terrified.  "Clark?  What is it?"

"Lex..."  And Superman was gone.

*****

The first time Lex died he was in a cornfield. 

It was also the day he came face to face with his destiny, so all in all it wasn't that bad.

The second time was in the front seat of a classic Mustang outside Club Zero.

To this day, he could think of no good that had come from that moment.

The third time was in a river, ironically not all that far from the cornfield. 

That was the day Destiny held hands with Fate, and Lex still considered it one of the best days of his life.

Lex had died three times; he knew that every moment he lived he was on borrowed time.

For that reason he often suspected he would not outlive his father; but honestly, it hadn't occurred to him that Lionel would be the one to end his life.

But here he was; his back against a wall, the edge of a sword against his throat.  One look in his dad's eyes had confirmed that whatever tenuous grasp Lionel still held on sanity was gone.

Lex was going to die tonight, and this time there was no coming back.  He had finally pushed too far, and he was about to pay the ultimate price.

He felt a curious lack of fear.  Children had died!  He'd had to step in, he had to stop LuthorCorp – he had to stop Lionel. 

His only real regret was that he had honoured Clark's wishes, and had not tried to contact him.  Now he would never have a chance to say a proper goodbye.

A crash in the distance momentarily distracted Lionel, but not enough to ease the pressure of the blade. Loud noise, a burst of light, then the odd feeling of peace as his throat was cut. 

A cry of rage, and then darkness descended as Lex watched Superman reaching out for him, begging him not to die.  And looking at him with Clark's eyes.

*****


Where Lex Luthor was concerned the euphemism "sleeping together" was just that.  He never actually slept with anyone he had sex with.

He hadn't had a "lover" since...  he'd never had a lover.  Only people he had sex with.

Waking up with his head resting on a very strong, solid, very male chest was an entirely new experience.

He liked it, that and the strong arms that held him close.  He felt amazingly safe.  Even though his throat was very sore. 

He just really, really, wished he could remember why he was sleeping with another man in a large pink clamshell...

*****

The next time Lex Luthor opened his eyes he was still in the giant pink clamshell, but he was alone.

He reached for... no one.

And wondered why he was crying.

*****

Lex really tried to wake up this time.  He realised that the giant pink clamshell had not been a dream.

His throat felt strange.  He wondered if he was dead. 

He realised that he wasn't alone.  Clark was lying beside him in the clamshell; sound asleep. 

Lex was going to wake him up, but then one strong arm reached for him, and as he settled his head on Clark's chest he decided that everything in the universe could wait.

*****

This time, when Lex opened his eyes, he forced himself to wake up and try to figure out why exactly instead of being dead in his father's office, or in a giant pink clamshell, he was naked in a bed with Jonathan Kent sitting in a chair watching him.

"Don't try to talk; your throat took a lot of damage.  Clark brought you here two days ago and asked us to keep you safe."

Lex tried to sit up but the pain in his head quickly changed his mind.  He looked at Jonathan and tried to will his many questions into the other man's mind.

Jonathan sighed.  "I have news when you're feeling a bit closer to healthy."

Lex closed his eyes, and let sleep come.

****

"No."

"There is no one else I trust to keep him safe."

"He's known me almost all of his life Kal-El, he'll see through the cowl in about fifteen seconds."

"There is no one else I trust to keep him safe."

"Lantern is willing, so is the Princess - hell even the Flash said..."

"There is no one else I trust to keep him safe."

Bruce actually caught himself sighing as he lowered his head and heard himself agreeing to go to Smallville.

*****

Batman was staring at him when he woke up.  There was something about the tension in his body that made Lex looked around.

"He's not here.  Pay attention Lex. Three weeks ago Lionel was found sitting on the floor of his office holding an antique sword and covered in your blood, babbling about Superman stealing his victory.  For thirty-six hours no one had a clue what had happened; then Chloe Sullivan and Lois Lane broke a story about Lionel and the direct connection to the disaster at the Children's Hospital.  Lionel was arrested, for that, and on suspicion of murder – your murder."

"...mrdr?"  Lex was amazed at how much trying to talk hurt until the memory of exactly what had happened in the LuthorCorp offices returned with a vengeance.  

Passage of time had become meaningless of late, but he was suddenly aware that he was being held tightly in Martha's arms, being rocked and comforted in a way his own mother might have done, and Jonathan was standing at the window.  Shadows in the room told him a lot of time had passed.  His throat ached and burned like hellfire, but his head felt strangely clearer.

He gave up talking as a lost cause.  Instead he lifted his head from Martha's shoulder and looked his questions into her eyes.

"You're fine; you just need some more time to heal.  Lionel can't get to you.  Other than Batman, who hasn't left for even a moment, Lois Lane, Pete, Gabe and Chloe are the only people other than us that know you're alive and safe."

Lex closed his eyes.  He'd made good choices.  Gabe Sullivan could run LeXcorp for years without any direct input from his boss.

He swallowed, shuddering against the pain and looked at Martha, ready to hear the rest.

She offered him a gentle smile, "Later.  You need to rest."

Lex settled into what he now guessed was Clark's old bed.  He looked at Jonathan, a thousand questions shining brightly in his eyes.

"I swear to you Lex, we didn't keep anything from you.  We didn't know - not about his background, we learned about that when we learned about Superman.  When he left us we still knew nothing...  He stopped trusting me.  We learned where our son came from in the New York Times along with the rest of the planet."

Lex closed his eyes, a father's pain too much for him to cope with right now. 

*****

Lex opened his eyes and took stock of his situation. 

He was still totally, and somewhat blissfully, unaware of the passage of time, but he knew that it was very early, the first light of false dawn filling the room.   He was still in Smallville, still in Clark's bed, still weak, but feeling closer to himself every moment.  His throat still hurt like hell, but it was bearable.  He was warm, safe, comfortable... and hungry.

And he was wrapped in a soft, red cape.

"Crk?"

It was Chloe who answered.  "He's outside.  He and his dad are… well I hope they're talking."

Lex held out his arms and Chloe was across the room and in them in a second.  "He's home Lex, he's come back to us."

"O, ot oo me…"

"Oh Lex, don't be an idiot.  He risked everything to save you."

".. aired."

"I know Lex, I know.  He's scared too.  He's a little afraid of his welcome."

"ove him."

"You love Clark; I think Superman is the one who's nervous."

"idit."  Lex sighed as sleep again claimed him.  "Ove m oo."

Chloe held him for a long time.  "I know Lex, I know…"

*****

Lex woke up with a start.  Someone was trying to take his cape away.

"No, mine…" Lex was delighted to note that his words were almost recognisable as English.  Okay, maybe a four year olds version of English, but it was definite progress.

"Easy Lex, it's only me."  Martha continued to pull the cape from around Lex's face.  He had been clinging to it for days now, and they both needed a little air.  "How do you feel?"

Lex thought about the question. "Uh… Fine?  I feel pretty good."  His voice was scratchy, but it didn't really hurt.  "Where's Clark?"

Martha sighed.  "Lex..."

"Martha… please, I'm not even really sure what happened."

"Okay.  Well let's start at the beginning.  What do you remember?"

"I was at LuthorCorp… my father… ohmygod."  Lex brought his had to this throat.  There was no bandages, no feeling of torn skin, nothing.  "Was it real?"

"It was real.  After the police found your father, no one had a clue as to what was happening.  Three weeks after that Clark brought you here.  That was six weeks ago."

"Six weeks?"

"You've been asleep.  Sedated. Healing."

"Clark?"

"Has been here for most of it.  He spent a lot of time just watching you.  Once we knew for certain that you would live, he announced that you were alive and under Superman's care and protection."

"Lionel?"

"Vanished.  He's been indicted on RICO and a few dozen other charges, including attempted murder.  Bail was five million, he used his Amex."

"Is Clark okay?"

Martha sighed, "He's better now that you're safe.  We've been talking.  He's been watching you, doing everything he could to keep you from harm.  He loves you so much Lex."

Lex reached out a hand and stopped her words.  "Martha, don't worry, I never stopped loving him, not for a second.  Now, this whole Superman thing has thrown me a little..."

"You're not alone there."  Jonathan stood at the doorway.  He looked old and tired to Lex's eyes.  "Can I come in?"

"I guess we were right about Superman."

"He never told us you know.  I mean the moment we saw him we knew, but we learned about Superman with the rest of the world."

"I knew he was angry, but I just somehow hoped that he'd made some peace with you and you'd simply kept it from me."

"Anger doesn't begin to describe it Lex.  I honestly think he hated me.  It's better now, but there is a lot of ground still to cover.  I think that he's been keeping track of our relationship – he trusted us to keep you safe."

"Jonathan… please, we have to make peace now.  He's come back to me and I am never going to let him go."

Jonathan sat on the bed and took Lex's hand in his.  "Lex, I can never make up for my stubbornness or my stupidity, but I can promise you that it will never happen again.  I'll do anything in my power to make sure that this time, things happen the way they were always meant to be."

"Good, so I have two very important questions.  First, where the hell is Clark?  And second… is that smell me?"

****

The fireball could be seen in Metropolis.

It was a little after three A.M. when LeXcorp Fertilizer Plant Number One exploded.

Lex stood beside the hospital beds of fifty-one survivors and reassured them that whatever their future might bring, financial problems would not be part of it. 

He attended forty-five funerals.  He stood at two graves and openly wept for men who had been willing to stand beside him from the beginning.

Martha, Jonathan, Pete and Gabe stood beside him every step of the way.

Superman went hunting.

*****

Lex signed his name to the last of the documents and passed the pile back over to Gabe.  "That it?"

Gabe smiled and began stacking the papers in his briefcase.  "Pete assures me that's it for a while.  These get filed with the SEC tomorrow and then LuthorCorp officially becomes a wholly owned subsidy of LeXcorp.  It's what we've been fighting for, but I wish the cost…"

Lex ran his fingers along scars that weren't there.  "The cost would have been too high no matter what, that's just the way my father plays Chess."

Gabe closed his case and held out his hand to Lex.  Lex stood up and pulled the other man into a quick embrace.  "Gabe, there is no way I can thank you for the last few weeks."

"My boss, my *friend*, is alive, and my daughter is happier than she's been in years.  Just please don't offer me a promotion… I don't think I can handle much more stress."

"Gabe, the only job higher on the food chain than yours is mine."

Gabe offered him a sad smile.  "Yeah, I know.  Listen; thank Martha for lunch.  I'll see you later in the week."

Lex watched him go then wandered around the Kent's kitchen.  He was still exhausted most of the time, but he was also starting to feel a little restless.   He knew he should have already cleared out of here, but he was reluctant.   For the first time in his memory, Lex wasn't lonely.  He loved Martha Kent, and of late Jonathan had been more of a father to him than Lionel ever had. 

A small pained sound escaped before he could stop it.  The thought of what had happened made his blood run cold.  Oddly enough he hadn't been having nightmares.  Sometimes he'd awaken to the vague memory of the beginnings of a dream, but he was safe and comforted and …

"FUCK!"

Lex stormed out of the kitchen.  He found the Kent's working on a tractor. "He's been here all along hasn't he?"

"Lex…"

"No, that damned coward has been here every fucking night hasn't he? No wonder I'm sleeping so well – I'm spending the night in his arms aren't I? 

"Lex…"

"No!  Don't you dare make excuses for him.  I've been pining for him for years and we're finally sleeping together and the son of a bitch doesn't have the common decency to WAKE ME UP?"

"Lex, are you listening to yourself?"

"Do you know how long I've been in love with that idiot?  Do you know how it felt when I woke up in that stupid clamshell and he was there?  I've been sleeping wrapped in his damned cape – has it not occurred to him that there’s a REASON?"

Jonathan looked at Martha and mouthed the word "*clamshell*?" at her.  He was about to interrupt when a gust of wind caught his attention.

"What the hell is the matter with your son?  I'm running three multinationals and half the damned planet from your *kitchen*.  Does he for a second stop and wonder why?   No, not at all.  Super-Chicken just skulks around…"   With a huff, Lex turned on his heels and stalked back to the house.

"Lex?  Where are you going?"

Lex looked over his shoulder.  "To pack – I'll be at the Castle."

*****

His dramatic departure didn’t quite go as planned as Lex realised that he needed to ask Jonathan for a drive.

Jonathan had managed to control his laughter, but Lex had to admit that he looked ten years younger with it dancing in his eyes.   When they reached the Castle, though the laughter turned to concern.  "Lex there is no way in hell I am letting you go in alone."

Lex just looked at him and grinned.  "You can't for a moment believe he's not in there."

"I can't be sure, and until we know that Lionel is in custody, I am not leaving you alone."

Lex just shook his head and climbed out of the truck.  "Just promise me that Clark and I can have a few minutes alone."

The Castle looked much as it always had.  He'd run LeXcorp from here long past the point it had been practical.  Even after he had conceded defeat and had made the move to Metropolis he still came back here as often as he could.

The morning after he had read Clark's letter, Lex had quietly told his staff that he wanted it kept up, but not to expect him quite so often. 

He'd thought about closing it outright, maybe selling it, but he'd kept the light in the window for a long, long time.  He hadn't been ready to blow that candle out.

He stopped in the front hall long enough to give a startled Jonathan a quick hug.  "I'll see you later... I feel the need for an afternoon nap."

*****

Clark was sitting on the bed.  "Drama Queen is not a good look on you Lex."

"It got you here didn't it?"

Clark blinked.  "That was an act?"

Lex crossed the room and sat down beside him.  "Not entirely.  I am seriously pissed that you've made me wait."

"Wait for what?"

"This."  Lex reached up and pulled Clark to him. 

Clark tensed in Lex's arms for a moment then simply melted.
 
So long, so very long.  Lex almost wept at the first taste in so many years. The first tentative touch of Clark's hand felt like sweet rainwater on his parched skin and Lex couldn't get enough. 
 
The kisses quickly become passionate.  Lex wanted to consume Clark, to own him.  He was hot and hard and he needed more.
 
Clark was shaking in his arms.  His need seeming as desperate as Lex's own. 

Lex manoeuvred them so they were lying facing each other then ground his erection against Clark’s answering heat.
 
Clark shuddered and moaned, and Lex felt the dampness at his groin.  He almost laughed, knowing that he wasn't far behind his eager lover.
 
Grinning, he opened his eyes, but instead of passion, Lex saw embarrassment. 
 
He felt Clark slide a hand around the back of his neck, he felt a short, sharp tug, and then he knew nothing more.

*****

It was early evening when Lex opened his eyes.  "Shit, Clark? What the hell?"

There was no answer, and Lex sat up "Clark?  Damn you, if you've taken off on me again..."

A sigh alerted him to the presence of Superman. "I have to go..."
 
"Go where?"

"Your dad.  I think I know where he is."

"Clark, promise me you'll come back; even if it's just to talk."

The whispered "I promise" was almost carried away on the wind as Superman vanished into the sky.

Lex heard it anyway.

*****

He watched Batman for a long time. "How long until you leave?"

"Fifteen seconds after Superman tells me it's safe."

"Is there no one else who could take your place as my bodyguard?"

"You find my company distasteful?"

"Robin?  Wonder Woman?  Tonto?"

"Don't be an ass, Luthor."

"I just feel that your time could be better spent... elsewhere."

"Normally I'd agree, but I committed to your protection."

"I love him."

Batman remained silent

"He's angry.  He's afraid and he's angry."

Silent still, but Batman turned to indicate that Lex had his attention.

"I don't want him to cross a line he can't come back from."

A tilt of a cowled head.

"Bruce?  Please go and keep my lover from murdering my father."

Batman closed his eyes.  "I'll make a call."

*****

"It's done."

Lex looked at Clark - no, at Superman, for there was little of the Clark he knew standing in front of him.  "Is he dead?"

"No."

"Is that your choice?"

"Not entirely."

"Is it over?"

"Is it ever over when Lionel Luthor is involved?  However, the Justice League has made sure that he will remain in custody."

"Then it's over."

"Okay."

"Are you going to stay awhile?"

"I should go..."

"Is the planet in any immediate danger?"
 
"Uh, well, I kinda do rounds..."
 
"Rounds.  Clark, I personally think that right here is where you need to be.  We need to have a conversation that is about fifteen years overdue."
 
"Lex, I don't think..."

"Damnit Clark, I did what you asked.  I stayed away.  I didn't approach you or Lois Lane.  I watched you with her, and I ached for you.  Please, I need..."
 
"Oh Lex, you don't understand."
 
"You're right, I don't. So please stop acting like a frightened virgin and..."  Lex's voice trailed off as he watched the colour drain from Clark’s face.
   
"Clark?  You don't mean...?  You can't mean...?  Never?  No one?"
 
"Lex, please, there's a lot you don't know."
 
"But you and Lois... "

"Lois is my friend, nothing more."

"Clark, are telling me that there has been no one...?"
 
"Yes."
 
Lex lay back on the bed and tried to get his breathing under control.  "Oh god, this is, is...."
 
"Pathetic?"

"Clark, are you paying any attention here?  I'm about to come just thinking of being your first...  no one else... no one ever...  you waited for me..."
 
"You... the idea turns you on?"
 
"Yes."
   
"Lex I, only you, only ever you."
 
Lex covered his eyes with one hand and held the other out to Clark.
 
When he felt Clark's hand touch his he almost cried.  "Clark, I love you, you just offered me something no one else ever has, you're offering me everything... it's more than I could ever hope for, so much more that I ever expected."
 
"I'm sorry about the other day, I was embarrassed."
 
"Don't be, if you hadn't knocked me out you'd have discovered I was only a few seconds behind you."

"I'm scared."

"I am too.  Clark, I have to confess to you that I've not been physically faithful.  It was only once, I'd just found out about you and Lois, and God, it hurt so much... only it hurt more after when I opened my eyes and it wasn't you."

Clark gathered Lex in his arms and lowered them to the bed, forgiveness as simple as a gesture.  Lex looked into his eyes and almost wept at the emotions he saw mirrored there.

"We have a lot to talk about.  Superman, the Justice League, Lois..."

"We have the rest of our lives to talk Clark, but right now the only thing I want is to make love with you."

"I don't think I was this nervous the first time we kissed."

Lex tugged Clark closer.  "Me either.  You can start by losing the pj's – who designed this getup anyway and how the fuck do you get it off?"

Clark looked at him.  Lex tugged on the waistband a little and waggled his eyebrows.  It worked; Clark started to laugh.   Still laughing he stood up and in the time it took Lex to blink Superman was gone, and Clark was sitting beside him.

Wearing nothing but a towel.

Lex looked at the perfection of the man he loved.  "Wow" was all the dialogue he could manage.  And Clark, *his* Clark, blushed.

"There you are.  I wondered."  Lex shook his head at his own sentimentality and stood up.  Toeing off his shoes, he began to unbutton his shirt.   "Scared?"

"God yes."

Lex took off his shirt and quickly stripped his pants.  "Me too.  Uh, Clark, there are a couple of things I want to tell you, before... well before."

Clark nodded absently; "You are so sexy."

Lex could only kiss him then. 

It was slow and sweet and beautiful.  Lex came with the first tentative touch of Clark's hand.  The sheer joy of it being Clark was too much for him.   Clark's shy, smug smile lasted only long enough for Lex to shift and take him into his mouth; Lex's name a shout as he too gave up control. 

"I've dreamed of this."  Clark's voice was like smoke, dancing in the patterns of late afternoon light.

"I've dreamed of you."

"I wanted to tell you the truth; I just didn't know how."

"I hated your father for a long time."

"What changed?"

"He was tearing himself apart, and taking your mother with him.  I knew that no matter what, I couldn't let that happen.  I knew that you'd blame yourself."

"Maybe.  I've learned a few hard lessons over the years; my messiah complex isn't what it once was."

"Are you going to stay?"

"I'm here, I'm with you, and I never wanted anything else."

Lex held Clark close until the kisses again became passionate.  "Will you make love to me Clark?"

"Soon.  But I want you to take me first.  I've wanted you for so long; I've waited so long..."

Conversation gave way to moans and sighs and whispers as the lovers came together.

Eyes met and locked as Lex gently entered Clark.  A lifetime of love and longing and understanding passing between them until finally it was enough, and Clark closed his eyes, silent as he came.

Lex thrust once more, his own orgasm almost taking him by surprise.   He looked into Clark's eyes, unsurprised to find them wet with tears.

"Clark I need you to know that I never once gave up.  Not for a second did I stop loving you, or stop hoping.  Everything I've done in my life I've done to make you proud, proud enough to maybe come back to me."

Clark's smile was touched with sadness.  "It was never a choice."

"Then this is a destiny that I will never fight."

End.

The Song:

Once upon a time
Once when you were mine
I remember skies
Reflected in your eyes
I wonder where you are
I wonder if you
Think about me
Once upon a time
In your wildest dreams

Once the world was new
Our bodies felt the morning dew
That greets the brand new day
We couldn't tear ourselves away
I wonder if you care
I wonder if you still remember
Once upon a time
In your wildest dreams

And when the music plays
And when the words are
Touched with sorrow

When the music plays
I hear the sound
I had to follow
Once upon a time

Once beneath the stars
The universe was ours
Love was all we knew
And all I knew was you
I wonder if you know
I wonder if you think about it
Once upon a time
In your wildest dreams