Title:  It Must Be Love
Author: Chelle
Email:  nursemichellec@yahoo.ca
Rating: PG13
Challenge: Position
Notes:  Cute (I hope), funny (I really hope) straight dialogue story.  My first of its kind.  Beta by dina, mistakes are mine.  Feedback?  Always.
Summary:  Lex is stoned and tells a story.  Bruce tries to make it better in the end.


Riiiiing!  Riiiiing! 

“Wayne.” 

“Bruce?” 

“…Yes?” 

“Bruuuuce!” 

“Lex?” 

“Yes, Lex!” 

“Lex, are you drunk?” 

“Drunk?  Me?  Phbbbt!  No Bruce, I haven’t had a drop in ooohhh, about 2 days.  I’m not drunk!” 

“Good, the last time you called me drunk you tried to sell me L-" 

“Nope, not drunk but really REALLY stoned.” 

“Lex!  What are you thinking?” 

“I’m thinking that I’m in a whole lot of pain, they have a whole lot of drugs, and I’m gonna take them.” 

“Wait a moment.  ‘A whole lot of pain’?  What happened, did you crash your car again?” 

“Hee hee!  Naaaah, nothing like THAT, Bruuuuuce.”    Whirr. 

“What’s that noise, Lex?” 

“My bed.  It moves, you know.  It has these buttons, and when you push one, the head goes up, and when you push another, the feet go up.  And when you push the red one, a nurse shows up!  And did I mention I’m in traction?” 

“That’s fascinating, Lex.  So, am I ever going to find out why you are in the hospital, on a whole lot of drugs?” 

“Suuuuure, you are, that’s why I called you!” 

“…..” 

“…..”

“Lex, are you still there?  Are you still conscious?” * soft laughter * 

“Shhh!  I’m listening!” 

“Listening to what?” 

“Listening to make sure no one is * listening *, Bruce.  Jeeez!” 

“Oooo-kay then.  So, what happened?” 

"We had sex.” 

“I’m sorry?” 

“I saaaiiid, WE HAD SEX!  We had sex, we fucked like monkeys, did the deed, bumped uglies, knocked boots.  We had sex!” 

“Ow!  Jesus, Lex that was my fucking ear!  And yes, I know we had sex, but that was a long time ago.” 

“Not US, silly.  WE had sex.  Me and Clark. Clark and I.  Me and Clark?  No, Clark and I.” 

“Ok, now that the grammar lesson is over, how about we back up the truck a little bit.  You and Clark had sex?  Like full-out-fucking-sex?  Or necking-on-the-couch-a-little-oral sex?” 

“Oh no, my fried….I mean friend.  We fucked.  I was the ever so willing fuckee, too.  The boy has a beautiful cock.”  * tuneless humming* 

“Please don’t call him a boy.  It makes you sound like a pedophile, Lex.  Wait, wait, wait.  Is this that farmboy you’ve been swooning over for two years?  PLEASE tell me he’s legal.” 

“Hmmmm?  Oh no, he’s legal alright.  Well, as legal as it gets in Kansas.  Hehehe.  Turned 18 yesterday.  We fucked last night.” 

“Ok, I know you’re dying to tell me.  Spill it.” 

“Ok, ok, good!  Oh Bruce, he has these lips….they were made to suck cock. But you can’t have him suck yours, because then I would have to kill you, and I love you, so I don’t want to have to kill you, Bruce.” 

“I don’t want your boyfriend to suck my cock, Lex, I have Dick for that.” 

“Dick for your cock…..bwaaaaah!”

“NOT funny, Lex.” 

“Nope.  Fucking hilarious!” 

“Ha.  Ha.  Ha.  Either finish, or I’m hanging up.” 

* snickering*  “Ok, ok.  Sheesh you’re cranky when I’m stoned.  Want some of my drugs?  No wait, I don’t wanna share THESE, either.  Anyhoo.  You remember when I told you about him before?  When I was inveshti-  unvestika-  looking into his…gifts?” 

 “Yes.” 

“Ok.  Well!  Turns out he’s strong.  Like really strong.  Like beyond comprehension strong.” 

“That’s pretty strong, Lex.  I have a good imagination.” 

“Take it, and then double it.  Back to the * hiss* story.  (Yes?  More drugs would be niiiiiice.  Thank you, miss!)  Aaaaahhhh.  Ok, so.  There was kissing, then there was licking, and there was some sucking thrown in there.  He can hold his breath a loooong time, Bruce.  No gag reflex either.  Niiiice touch, that.  So we’re going at it, and he was inside me, and he has a really nice cock, too.  Big without being porn-big, you know?” 

“Sigh.  Yes Lex, I can imagine.  Continue.” 

“So he’s fucking me, and he’s going hard, and deep.  And I’m begging him to go harder and deeper, and he has my leg over his arm.  And he listened to me.  And we found out that I kinda really don’t bend that way.” 

“Excuse me?” 

“Weeelll…..he kinda bent me a little too far….and dislocated my hip.” 

“Holy fuck Lex, how strong IS he?” 

“Uuuhhh…really strong?” 

“I have no idea what to say to that.  Do you know the pressure one would have to exert in order for someone to dislocate one’s hip while fucking?” 

“If I wasn’t so stoned I would, Mr. Smarty-ass.” 

“Tell me he’s not abusing you, Lex.” 

“What?  NO!  He just has to learn control.  And I have to learn to watch what I ask for.  Hehehe.  Up until the POP! it felt really really good.”

“Lex….” 

“Bruce…promise.  It was an accident.  He already feels like shit.  And tomorrow, he is going to come see me.  And when I am better, we are going to do it again.  But I think that this time I may be on top.  Til he learns some control.” 

“Probably wise, Lex.” 

“….”

“Lex?” 

“Mmmmm?” 

“Are you passing out on me now?” 

“Probably….” 

“Are you going to remember this conversation tomorrow?” 

“Probably not…”  * giggling* 

“Goodnight, Lex.” 

“’Night, Bruce.   I love him.” 

“I know, Lex.” 

Click. 

*  five seconds later * 

Sniffle “Hello?” 

“Superman, it’s Batman.  It was an accident.  Do NOT feel guilty.  He loves you.  You love him.  It was an ACCIDENT.” 

Sniffle  “Thank you, Bruce.”

 

~fin~