Clark watched lazily as Lex put a CD in the player. “One I got for you,” he had said, and Clark smiled, knowing that his and Lex’s taste in music didn’t always overlap. 

And sometimes? Lex had no idea what he liked, either, as he realised Lex had bought him an…NSYNC CD. Well, if it wasn’t NSYNC, it was the Backstreet Boys. Still, on listening, the music wasn’t awful, and Clark put his arm around Lex and kissed him lightly. 

“It’s not my usual style,” he admitted, when Lex asked point-blank. “But it’s not too bad,” he added at Lex’s slightly unhappy look. “In fact, it’s interesting, the way they harmonise…” 

The music continued, as did Clark and Lex’s kisses. Clark was feeling much more…relaxed, as they kept kissing.

“That song…oh, god…” He tightened his arms around Lex. “Whitney…” And he knows he doesn’t need to say more, at least not right now. 

As the song played, memories ran through Clark’s mind. 

It had been a long time before he’d been able to think of Whitney as more than an annoyance, someone who had what he wanted. Clark had thought about Whitney a lot, but it had taken a while to realise that he was thinking about Whitney more than he was thinking of Lana, and even longer to realise why. 

Their first kiss had been an accident, almost. Clark had planned to kiss Whitney, but he’d imagined it being rather different than the way it had been. He’d imagined it being night time, talking, holding hands first. And they’d ended up kissing on his loft couch one day, totally unexpectedly. Not at all unwelcome, and in a way it was a relief that Whitney had been the one to initiate it. 

Being out in Smallville wasn’t really an option, so Clark had never even thought about it. He’d just taken and given what he could, told people who he’d trusted and kept it from anyone who he couldn’t, and Whitney had done the same. They’d spent a lot of time alone, too. Kissing. Touching. Figuring out how to do more. Clark still laughed about the first hand job Whitney had given him. Neither of them had expected him to come quite so soon, and they’d ended up with come-spattered clothes. 

Clark laughed softly as he remembered. 

“Good thoughts?” Lex asked softly, kissing Clark again. 

Clark smiled. Lex was never jealous of Whitney. He’d asked once, if Lex felt it was unfair that he’d had someone else as a first lover. Lex’s reply that he would have liked to be the first, but he could hardly object given his past experience, had been the most wonderful thing Lex had ever said to him. Well, following the first time he’d said “I love you,” that is. 

“Just remembering. How young we were. The first time we did anything, I came all over us both.” 

“You do that often enough now,” Lex chuckled. 

“Yes, but usually it’s intentional,” Clark grinned. “This song,” he said, quietly. “It was the only song we ever danced to…” 

They hadn’t tried to date. The not being able to be out in Smallville thing had been part of it, and they hadn’t needed to sneak around, to take Chloe and Lana to parties and pretend to be with them and not each other. 

But they had, when Clark’s parents had asked them, dressed up and had dinner with them. That was all the dating they’d ever done. And one of those evenings, Jonathan had put a CD on and started to dance outside on the porch with his wife. That wasn’t so unusual. What had been unusual, was that this time, Jonathan and Martha had asked Clark and Whitney to join them. 

They had, Whitney taking the lead and Clark happily following. Dancing in the cool night air, the music washing over them. Looking up and seeing the stars, then moving closer to Whitney, kissing him lightly, even that done while Jonathan and Martha were too engrossed in each other to notice. The song had played, and they had danced, the moonlight shining on them. 

It hadn’t been long after that that Whitney’s father had died. It was a change for them. It wasn’t that Whitney loved Clark any less, and Clark knew that. But Whitney’s place in the world had been changed, and Clark knew he couldn’t hold him back, even if he wanted to, very badly. 

Things had seemed to move so fast after that. Whitney joining the Marines, then hearing he was missing. The confirmation of his death had shaken Clark more than anything in his life, except for hearing of his origins. And he felt guilt that he’d never told Whitney. He’d planned to, but it never happened. 

And through it all, there was Lex. His friend. The only person he’d really talked to – aside from his parents – about his feelings. 

It was slow, the change. So unlike it had been with Whitney. It had taken a very long time for Clark to figure out how he felt about Lex. 

“I’m glad you loved him,” Lex said quietly as the CD finished. “You were able to know what you felt for me was love, then.” 

“It is, and it always will be,” Clark replied, looking at their joined hands, and the rings on them that gleamed gold. “But there’s always going to be a place in my heart for him.” 

“I couldn’t love you if there wasn’t,” Lex replied and kissed Clark.

Finis

The Dance, by Garth Brooks   

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared 'neath the stars alone
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance

Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn't I a king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey who's to say you know I might have chanced it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain but I'd of had to miss the dance