December 12

CRIME:

Sentinel - Jim/Blair

Author: Kata Avalon
Title: First Festival of Light  
Date: December 12
Fandom: The Sentinel / TV series
Pairing: Jim/Blair  
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Having your first child can be easier than expected.  
Disclaimer: still not mine, unfortunately, and I do not get a cent from this.  
Feedback address: kata_avalon@yahoo.co.uk  
Advertisement: Part of the Slash Advent Calendar 2004
http://www.kardasi.com/Advent/2004/SAC-2004.htm  
Note: AU, mpreg  
Beta: Heartfelt thanks to Zaerie and Beav for their help.  

THE FIRST FESTIVAL OF LIGHT

Jim crouched down and tried to make himself as small as possible, which was definitely not easy for someone his size. Various spells and an occasional bullet whizzed through the doorway past him.  
 
He turned his head and looked at Rafe who was also crouching down, though on the other side of the doorway. The young magic user had his eyes closed, concentrating on preparing his retaliatory spells. Rafe opened his eyes and nodded at Jim. He stood up.  
 
Jim checked his gun as he too rose. He could sense the energy as Rafe readied himself. They glanced at one another.  
 
The two men moved at the same time.  
 
***
 
Jim got up off the floor and cursed softly. Luckily he had landed on the soft carpet after one of the last spells from the bad guy had knocked him on his butt.  
 
Rafe was standing by the aforementioned bad guy, a midlevel weapons dealer, making sure he was out cold. “You okay?” he asked the sentinel.  
 
“Yep, just bruised my butt. Just what was it anyway?”
 
“Didn’t get a good look at it, but it felt benign. The guy was using the last of his ready spells,” Rafe told him. The magic user did not sound too worried. “This one won’t wake up for some time.” He commented, gesturing at the unconscious bad guy.  
 
Jim took out his cell phone. “Ellison and Bryant, here. We’ve got our perp under control,” he announced.  
 
“Good. Brown and Wincock are doing good, and Pendergast and his SWAT team have the area covered. Either of you injured?” Banks asked.  
 
“Nope, we’re good.”  
 
***
 
Of course, the clean up and reports took hours. They had plenty of evidence against the gun-dealers, but Captain Banks did not want to take any chances. It was well past sundown before Jim and Rafe could leave for their well-earned rest.  
 
The sentinel yawned as he got out of his truck. He listened. The guide was at the loft, snoring away. He smiled and entered the apartment building. Thank the lucky stars the elevator was in working order. He was in no condition to deal with the steep stairs.  
 
After a minimum amount of evening rituals, Jim crawled into bed totally exhausted.  
 
“Mmm-mm?”  
 
“Just me, go back to sleep, Blair,” Jim murmured softly to his guide and lover.  
 
“Mm-kay,” Blair agreed. The super-snuggler moved closer to his favourite teddy bear and dropped back into sleep.  
 
Jim yawned again. He settled into an optimum sleeping position on the bed, turning toward his bed companion, and was asleep within seconds.  
 
***
 
Jim woke up the next morning to the feel of a familiar hand caressing his stomach. He purred at the sensation.  
 
“Morning,” Blair breathed into his ear. The guide started nibbling at his neck.  
 
Jim decided to just lay back and enjoy it. They had nowhere urgent to be that morning; Banks had given him the morning off and Blair did not have morning classes on Thursdays. A late breakfast / early lunch sounded like a small price to pay for some morning lovemaking.  
 
***
 
Paperwork, paperwork, Jim hated paperwork, but it had to be done. He really would have preferred someone else to do it, but his number one candidate was busy with his own day job unfortunately.  
 
Jim sighed. It was a boring day and seemed that even Mother Earth agreed with him; it was cold, drizzling and cloudy.  
 
The sentinel was startled out of his contemplation of the weather as his cell phone rang. It was Blair.  
 
“Hi, Blair… Sure, where?… Okay. I’ll see you then.” Jim closed the phone. Blair wanted to talk about something with him, something serious by the sounds of it. He had a bad feeling about this.  
 
***
 
It was an unusually sombre Blair that waited for him by the restaurant entrance. The guide was standing under the awning, not twitching, bouncing or reading. Jim had a really bad feeling about this.  
 
“Hi, Jim.”
 
Jim nodded in greeting. His mouth would not work.  
 
They went inside and were seated at a secluded table that Blair had reserved in advance. Jim fiddled with a menu. Blair did not even pick up his.  
 
“Okay, I’ll just… get to the point. Professor Stoddard came to see me today.”  
 
“One of your old teachers? The one that specialised in ancient spells?” Jim asked. They had been together only for a short time and Jim was not yet sure just who was who among Blair’s acquaintances and friends. Sometimes it seemed his guide’s social network covered the whole town, unlike Jim’s network that covered his co-workers and few others.  
 
“Yes. He’s preparing an expedition that’s due to set off in a month, and invited me to join the group. Apparently, one of the members broke a leg and can’t go.”  
 
“For how long?” Jim asked quietly, with a sinking feeling in his stomach.  
 
“Six months,” Blair whispered, as if he could not quite say it out loud. As if just whispering it softened it somehow.  
 
***
 
The rest of the day seemed to go by in a blur. Jim felt numb. His senses felt heavy, drowned in tar. His guide was leaving. Blair had promised he would come back, back to him. Jim wanted to believe him, but how could he? They had only known each other for two months and were so different. Blair was outspoken, energetic and people liked him, while Jim was quiet and aloof, plus prone to grumpiness.  
 
“I swear I’ll come back to you, my sentinel,” his guide swore to him that night as they lay together in bed. Jim was desperate to hold on to him for as long as he could. The sentinel had wrapped his limbs around his guide; his senses were basking in his guide’s smell, touch, taste and heartbeat.  
 
“I’ll wait for you,” Jim promised softly. There was no place for Jim in the expedition. Stoddard had hired sentinels trained for archaeology and excavations; Jim would be merely in the way if he came along.  
 
***
 
After a month of last minute preparations, everything was set. It was time to go.
 
Blair felt bad about leaving his newfound sentinel, but this was an opportunity of a lifetime. He could not let this pass through his fingers. If everything went well, he would be able to choose when and where to go next - and maybe be even able to take Jim with him. Let this one go, and there might very well never be another chance. It was now or never. Besides, it would only be six months.  
 
Blair sighed as he hugged Jim goodbye at the door of the loft. The guide’s eyes were suspiciously moist.  
 
“I’ll dream of you,” Blair promised.  
 
Jim nodded. He was crying softly. Blair felt like a grade A jerk as he turned and walked out the door. Just six months, he kept repeating to himself as he took out his handkerchief. Just six months…
 
***
 
Banks partnered Jim with Joel. The older detective had latent guide abilities and would be able to help Jim while Blair was away. His senses would become more erratic while his permanent guide was away for so long. Jim was a mature sentinel with experience in using his senses so there should not be any problems they could not handle. Unlike during the time without Blair, without a permanent guide to anchor his sentinel abilities.  
 
Jim had had several temporary guides and his senses had been somewhat dull. Also their acuteness had changed according to the compatibility with the current guide, which caused problems now and then. One time he had suffered an allergic reaction to a sanitary product he had been using for some time, during a different guide. Jim did not want to return to that time of unpredictability and instability.  
 
The first month went well enough. The Ellison-Taggart team solved a series of jewel store thefts and Jim testified in court against a serial rapist who, mostly thanks to his and two victims’ testimony, was sentenced to 20 years in prison. Still, Jim was feeling blue. Every night his senses searched for his guide, missing the comforting sound of the guide’s heartbeat, and Jim sorely missed Blair.  
 
***
 
“How is everything?” Blair asked over a static-filled line.  
 
“Joel’s been guiding me at work. We caught some jewel thieves.” Jim paused as the line squeaked loudly. “I miss you,” he stated.  
 
“I miss you too, sentinel mine.”  
 
***
 
Jim grimaced as he drank the warm ginger ale. He took another bite of a cracker and sighed. His stomach seemed unusually finicky these days and threw a temper tantrum at just about anything. Jim sighed as he felt another twitch in his stomach and put the half-eaten saltine down on a plate.  
 
Nothing to it, he had to go to a healer. This had gone on long enough.  
 
***
 
Jim felt silly sitting on a floor pillow with his shirt off and his trousers unbuttoned. The healer moved her hand above his stomach, concentrating on the flow of the energies created by life, and distorted by illness. Jim could feel her inquisitive touch flowing inside him; it tingled on and under his sensitive skin.  
 
The healer removed her hand. She straightened her back and opened her grey eyes.  
 
“You may put on your shirt,” she said, smiling slightly as she straightened her back and settled on her own floor pillow.  
 
Jim felt nervous as he buttoned his trousers. “So, what is it? What’s the verdict?”
 
“There is nothing wrong with you, dear. You’re pregnant,” the healer announced cheerfully.  
 
Jim froze with his shirt half-on. Pregnant, he was pregnant. And Blair was away and would be for another five months.  
 
***
 
He was two months pregnant, and his guide was on an expedition a continent away. Should he let Blair know? But this was not something you told over the phone and a letter could take weeks to reach him. Besides, what could Blair do? Leave the dig? This was a golden opportunity for Blair. The child would be born in December and Blair should return in September. There would be plenty of time for them to sort things out. Except that Blair might not like the surprise.  
 
Jim took a deep breath and forced himself to stop pacing. He and Blair had mated, they were a permanent pair. All the sentinels were fertile, but some needed a simple spell to be able to conceive. Looked like Jim was one of those who did not need the aid of magic. They had not yet talked of having children, but neither had used contraception. Blair was the father, no doubts about it; his guide would not turn his back on Jim or their child. It would be all right.  
 
Still, Jim did not like the thought of telling him the news over a phone. Blair rarely had a chance to call him and whenever he did, the connection was uncertain and crackly. Jim would wait. Wait until Blair got to a more reliable phone, or until Blair came home. Whichever came first.  
 
***
 
“How are the excavations going?” Jim asked. He could hear people talking in Spanish in the background.  
 
“Really well, looks like the” crackle “…been abandoned for millennia.” squeak “…doesn’t think anyone’s been there to distort the magic lines.”  
 
“I’m glad for you,” Jim said, and he was. Blair lived for the joy of discovery. His guide was always looking for the new idea, the new taste or the new angle to a puzzle.  
 
“I just wish you were here with me,” Blair said softly. Jim almost did not hear him.  
 
“Me too.”
 
***
 
During the second month AB (after Blair left) as Jim nowadays measured time, he and Joel were involved in taking down a prostitution ring. The case had been going on for months and had involved people from just about every department. Everyone in the Cascade PD was feeling good about the successful bust, even Jim.  
 
“Hi, Jim. What’s wrong?” Joel asked his temporary sentinel. They were sitting at a relatively quiet table in the crowded bar/billiard room. Most of the detectives involved in the case had come to Jake’s to have a few and celebrate the bust.  
 
“Besides the fact that my guide still has four months of expedition ahead of him?” Jim asked dryly.  
 
“Yes, besides that.”
 
Jim sighed. “Feeling uncertain, I guess.”
 
“Surely you’re not worried that Blair would cheat on you?” Joel asked, horrified at the mere thought.  
 
Jim shrugged. “The trained sentinels at the dig would be more suitable for him,” he said quietly, feeling sorry for himself.  
 
“Jim, I’ve known you for some time, and met Blair, and it’s clear to anyone with eyes that you’re suited for each other. Blair loves you and he’ll come back to you. And he would never cheat on you,” Joel stated with absolute conviction.  
 
Jim nodded. He knew that, in his heart, but still there was that nagging doubt in the back of his head. Or maybe it was just mixed up hormones talking.  
 
***
 
Jim rubbed his stomach absently as he lay on the bed. He could sense the child moving. It was alive, and growing. A sentient being was growing inside of him.  
 
He looked at the sky through the ceiling skylight. The child would grow inside of him, and then it would be born. It would grow to be its own person. The mere thought felt incredible.  
 
“The one true miracle in the world,” he whispered to the room. All that was missing to make this perfect was his guide and mate to share the moment with. He could feel the tears forming at the thought.  
 
***
 
Jim struggled up from the ground. Yet another successful arrest, thanks to the Ellison-Taggart team.  
 
Jim dusted off his clothing. The suspect had tried to escape and he had had to run off after the guy. As he had been wrestling with the murder suspect, he realised that he had more than himself to protect now. The small one inside of him trusted him to take care of it, to keep it safe.  
 
Jim watched as the suspect was hauled off to a black-and-white. He wanted Blair to be able to meet their child; he wanted to protect their child the best he could until then. So, what could he, or should he, do?  
 
***
 
“You’re what?” Jim had never seen Simon Banks so flabbergasted.  
 
“I’m resigning,” Jim repeated.  
 
Banks looked at him from behind his desk. The captain shook his head as if to clear it.  
 
“But why? I thought you were doing well with Taggart.”  
 
“I am, but… Look, Simon, it’s personal. And once Blair returns, we’ll have to look over our options. That might mean moving away,” Jim explained, purposefully vaguely. He did not want to tell his boss the real reason, because his guide had the right to be the first one to know that they were expecting.  
 
Simon sighed. “The unit is doing well and I’d prefer not to mess with success. It’s three months until Sandburg’s return, right?”
 
“Yes, sir.”  
 
“I’ll put you on unpaid leave for four months. It will give you time to think about the future, and talk things over with your guide.”
 
Jim nodded. It sounded like a good compromise.  
 
***
 
“Anything new happening over there?” Blair asked.  
 
Jim thought for a moment. “Rafe’s seeing Bao from Personnel, and I took four months of unpaid leave.”  
 
“What? Why?” his guide sounded truly confused.  
 
“Irregular hours, risks, not so good pay. I want to be with you. I just.” squeak. ”Want to look at all the options,” Jim finished softly.  
 
“I understand,” Blair said slowly. Was that a goat he heard in the background? “Promise me you’ll wait until I return before making any life-altering decisions?” he asked.  
 
A bit too late for that, Jim thought. “I promise.”
 
***
 
Jim bought a stack of books on pregnancy and children. He wanted to be prepared, and he needed to know just what he had gotten himself into. He also went shopping for maternity clothes. His well-toned stomach and abs was history. His stomach was rounder and softer nowadays, and it was growing bigger by the day. Hence, he needed some new clothes.  
 
After a trip to the maternity clothes store, he wandered around the other stores geared towards new parents and babies, looking at all the paraphernalia on sale. The variety was staggering. Did babies really need all these things, Jim wondered as wandered down the aisles of a furniture and accessories store.  
 
***
 
August was unusually warm, for Cascade. Jim went to the beach and basked in the rare warmth and sunlight. For once, no one hit on him since his pregnancy was showing so obviously. Jim could hide the beginning bulge in his midsection under loose t-shirts and slacks, but on the beach with mere swimming trunks on it was quite visible. Jim was pretty certain Joel suspected something, but as long as no word reached Blair’s ears, it was of no consequence.  
 
***
 
“It’s finally starting to get cooler here as summer nears its end,” Blair told him. The guide had complained of the heat during the warmest summer months. “I’m actually missing Cascade’s cool weather, if you can believe that.”  
 
“Hard to believe, you complained of it so often during winter,” Jim commented grinning.  
 
“Yeah, yeah, I know. But most of all, I miss you,” Blair admitted.  
 
“And I miss you,” Jim said. His senses were always calmer and sharper after the calls, but his heart was not so easily placated. It missed the presence of its chosen, its other half.  
 
***
 
Finally, September, the most anticipated month ever. Jim fussed over his clothing. He wanted to tell Blair alone, in peace, not shout out his ‘condition’ to everyone in the airport. After all, some of the other members of the expedition would arrive on the same flight and the hall was sure to be crowded.  
 
A large long sleeved shirt with baggy trousers would have to do.  
 
***  
 
Jim paced nervously behind the crowd. Joel and Simon were also on the airport, waiting for Sandburg and keeping an eye on the sentinel as he paced back and forth, back and forth. Blair had kept in touch with them through letters. There were also some of Blair’s friends from the university as well as family members of the other expedition members in the arrivals hall. Jim let them be in the foreground, he wanted to face his guppy in private. Well, as much in private as you could get in an international airport.  
 
The flight landed on time for which Jim offered a short prayer of thanks to any deity willing to look over a poor, nervous sentinel.  
 
Jim and the others waited more or less patiently as the passengers went through customs, passport control and claimed their luggage.  
 
Jim’s stomach turned as the first passengers from the flight appeared. The little one sensed his anxiety and was nervous as well, making its discomfort known.  
 
“Oh, shit. Joel,” Jim began as he walked a few steps towards the older man. “I’m going to go over to the vending machines to get some water. If Blair comes while I’m there…”  
 
“I’ll let him know where you are,” the large man assured him.  
 
“Thanks.”  
 
Jim walked quickly to the vending machines several feet away. He got himself a cool bottle of water and leaned against the wall, taking a sip. All the uncertainties rushed back, with a force. He let them flow through and took a deep breath, held it and released it unhurriedly. He would not know the answer to any of the questions plaguing him until he told Blair, and saw his guide’s reaction.  
 
A commotion by the gate had Jim turning his head and zooming in with the combination of sight and sound. Blair and the others had arrived.  
 
He took another drink from his water bottle and left the comforting sturdiness of the wall. He calmed his nerves and started to walk towards the group of people. Time to find the answers.  
 
***
 
Blair was somewhat surprised to see both Joel and Simon in the crowd, but no Jim. He greeted his friends from the university and assured them that he would be at the U tomorrow. The crowd moved and shifted around him as family members and friends greeted each other and then moved on to get to their cars, buses or taxis.  
 
Blair walked over to Joel and Simon. He greeted them and was about to ask of Jim when he caught sight of the sentinel walking towards them, with a water bottle in one hand. Jim wore baggy clothes and looked a bit tired, but to Blair he looked absolutely gorgeous.  
 
Blair all but threw his bags at Simon and rushed over to Jim. It felt great to hold his sentinel in his arms again. Kissing him was even better.  
 
“You’ve gained some weight,” he commented softly, arms wrapped around Jim’s waist. Jim blushed. “How about we go home? I want to talk for an hour and spend the rest of the day in bed,” he suggested.  
 
“Sounds good,” Jim said smiling. There was something off about the smile, but Blair pushed the worry aside. They would talk back at the loft.  
 
***
 
Blair groaned as he collapsed on the couch. “Home, sweet home.”  
 
Jim put Blair’s bags by the closet door and walked back to close and lock the front door. Then, he walked over to Blair and sat down beside his guide. “I missed you,” he said and petted Blair’s thigh.  
 
“I thought of you every day,” Blair said softly. “I’m not going anywhere without you for months, years. It’s been bad enough being separated for half a year.” Blair held Jim’s hand in his.  
 
“I… I wanted to wait until you were here, to tell you,” Jim started. The sentinel stared at their interlocked hands refusing to meet his guide’s eyes. “Didn’t want to tell this in the phone, over a bad connection.”  
 
“What is it?” Blair could feel a knife of ice stabbing his heart. If Jim told him he had found another guide…
 
Jim took a deep breath and raised his head to look Blair in the eyes. Two nervous sets of blue met. “I’m pregnant,” Jim announced.  
 
Blair stared at Jim’s face, then his stomach. “Pregnant? Not putting on weight?”  
 
“Yes, I am, and no, I’m not. Well, not in the usual sense.”
 
“How far along?” Blair asked, trying to wrap his mind around the idea.  
 
“Seventh month, the child’s due in December.”
 
“The morning session before Stoddard asked me to join him?” Blair thought out loud after a quick calculation. Jim blushed.  
 
“Yeeaa!!” Blair hugged his sentinel in joy.  
 
“So, I take it this is good news?” Jim asked as his guide hugged him hard enough to bruise his ribs, but mindful of his growing stomach.  
 
Blair raised his head from Jim’s neck. “Very, very good,” Blair assured him, and kissed him breathless. The kiss swiped away all the insecurities and worries that had plagued Jim for months.  
 
***
 
Later on, the pair lay together on the large bed upstairs. Blair caressed Jim’s rounded belly in wonder. His child, their child, a being that had been created on a lazy morning seven months ago was growing there, inside his mate. It seemed impossible, yet it had happened.  
 
“Do you know the gender?” Blair asked.  
 
“No.”
 
“Didn’t ask?” Jim was suspiciously quiet. “Jim?” Blair demanded, sitting up to look at his mate who would not look him in the eyes.  
 
“I haven’t been to a clinic,” Jim told the roof quietly.  
 
“What?” Blair could not believe his ears.  
 
“A healer checked the health of the child as she confirmed I was pregnant. Besides, I’m a sentinel. I can sense if something is wrong,” Jim said petulantly.  
 
Blair shook his head. “Still, it sounds foolhardy.”  
 
“It didn’t feel right, to go there without you,” Jim said, sounding a bit embarrassed.  
 
Blair stretched out again next to Jim. “I can understand that, but still… First thing tomorrow morning, we’re going there. I want to make sure you’re both alright.”  
 
Jim nodded. “Don’t forget that we have to go shopping for a baby stroller, baby clothes, toys etcetera. And you’re going to be the one to tell your mother she’s going to be a grandmother,” Jim mock growled.  
 
“Oh, goddess.” Blair flopped over to press his face on the pillows as he moaned. Jim grinned, totally unsympathetic. After all, he did not have such worries. His mother and younger brother had died in an accident when he was but three years old. His father had focused all his attentions on gathering wealth, and had left Jim quite a fortune when he died of a heart attack some years back. His son had thought of himself as an orphan for years before his father died.  
 
***
 
Blair reserved a time for them at the nearby maternity clinic for later that same day. The guide wanted to be certain everything was proceeding well. Jim suspected Blair also wanted official confirmation that he was really going to be a father before the turn of the year. He could not blame Blair; a lot had changed in such a short time.  
 
***
 
The clinic was situated in an old three-storey brick building. The inside was decorated with cheerful and bright colours that did not help calm Blair’s nerves any. Jim noticed that some of the personnel and other patients were fighting hard not to laugh as Blair paced frenetically in the waiting room, practically bouncing with excitement. Jim, however, was calmly reading a book on the history of motherhood as he waited to be called in.  
 
“Ellison!”  
 
Startled, Blair jumped up about three feet. Jim shook his head at his mate’s antics as he put his book into a canvas bag and they went to the exam room.  
 
***
 
The grey-haired healer removed his hand and opened his eyes.  
 
“Everything is proceeding well. The middle of December, you said?” he asked as he sat back.  
 
Jim nodded.  
 
“I’d agree with the estimation. You could give birth at home or here. Do you have any preferences?” he asked, looking at them both.  
 
Jim glanced at Blair. “I think I’d prefer to give birth at the loft.”  
 
Blair nodded slowly. “The loft is relatively close to the clinic, if anything goes wrong.”  
 
“Nothing should,” the healer assured him.  
 
***
 
Blair drove Jim to the mall before heading to Rainier University. The sentinel wanted to go look at some new maternity clothes. Blair had promised to take Friday off to go shopping for baby gear, the stores would be too crowded on a Saturday and could be torture for a sentinel’s sensitive ears, let alone for non-sentinels who did not have convenient dials for their senses.  
 
Blair parked in the university parking lot switching off the engine and just stared at the brick wall. He was really going to be a father. Jim was really pregnant. The baby was going to be born in a little over two months. The thoughts filled him with dread and excitement.  
 
He could remember how proud the older members of the team had been of their kids as they had showed around the photos they carried with them one warm evening. He had decided to take up the subject of children with Jim after returning to Cascade, but it seemed Fate had beaten him to the punch.  
 
Blair sighed and got out of the car. It would not be all smiles and roses; he was enough of a realist to know that. There would be quarrels, sleepless nights, figuring out how to go on a vacation with kids, watching them grow up… But he was certain it would be worth it.  
 
Blair set out for his office. It was Jim and it was their child. Yes, it would be worth it.  
 
***
 
Jim took a deep breath and entered the Cascade PD. He had talked this over with Blair and had made his decision. Now he just had to implement it.  
 
“Hi, guys,” he greeted Rafe and Joel. The two were standing before the large doors leading to Major Crimes.  
 
“Hi, Jim. How you doing?” Rafe asked.  
 
“Fine, I’m here to see Simon. He in?” Jim asked, gesturing to the closed doors to the Captain’s office.  
 
“Yep, and in a good mood, too,” Rafe added.  
 
“So, are you coming back to work after your ‘honeymoon’?” Joel asked. The older detective looked at him with a thoughtful expression.  
 
“Actually, no,” Jim said. He started to walk towards Simon’s office before the two detectives could question him as to the why’s and how’s.  
 
***
 
“Are you certain?” Banks asked.  
 
“Yes. You see, I’m pregnant.”  
 
Simon looked startled. “Damn. Joel wins the pool then.”  
 
“You had – Of course you had bets going on. I swear, Major Crimes has more bets going on than the Cascade race track,” Jim said dryly.  
 
Simon actually looked mildly embarrassed. “It’s good for morale, as long as it stays within certain limits, of course.”  
 
“Of course,” Jim agreed, careful to hide his knowing smirk.  
 
***
 
Jim was putting away the baby clothes in a large wooden chest Blair had bought at an auction. The guide had taken one look at the array and prices of new baby clothes, and had dragged him out of the shop they were in. It was not the price as much as the fact that the baby was going to grow out of the clothes in a couple of months anyways, Blair had pointed out. Since then, they had been touring flea markets, garage sales and used clothing shops. They now had enough baby clothes to clothe their child for its first six months and had paid only a fraction of what it all would have cost in a baby store. Blair had once commented that some of the clothes could be stored away for a brother or sister, Jim had looked at his better half and told him to wait until the first one was born before planning another one. They had not talked of the subject after that, the issue had been shelved until later.  
 
“Still no luck?” Jim asked as he heard Blair put down the phone.  
 
“Nope, Uncle Albert finally visited the retreat, but it turns out Naomi left it a few days ago,” Blair said, sounding worried.  
 
Jim closed the lid on the chest. “I’m sure she’s fine. Your mom knows how to take care of herself,” he said as he walked down the stairs of the bedroom.  
 
“I know, but I’m worried.” Blair was sitting by the kitchen table and looking at the phone as if it held the answer to the mystery of his mother’s latest disappearance.  
 
Jim walked over to his mate. “Just worried or having a premonition?” he asked softly, hugging his mate.  
 
“A premonition, I’m afraid. It’s getting stronger. Jim,” Blair sighed, caressing Jim’s arms.  
 
“I’m coming with you,” the sentinel stated.  
 
Blair looked dubious.  
 
Jim snorted. “Come on, it’s the beginning of October and I won’t give birth until December. You really think it will take two months for you to find your mother? Besides, you said you wouldn’t go anywhere without me for months. Remember?” Jim said softly.  
 
Blair rose and turned to hug his mate. He had to do it sideways nowadays as Jim’s belly had grown quite large. “The retreat is in Southern California. You think you can handle the airplane? The change in pressure and the flow of magic is difficult enough for you to handle, let alone when you’re pregnant,” Blair said, clearly worried for his mate and their child.  
 
“The senses are numbing down already, they’re concentrating on the baby. I can handle it, love. Don’t you worry,” Jim reassured him.  
 
***
 
Jim gritted his teeth as the flows changed around them and the plane began its ascent into the skies. He forced himself to calm down. Blair glanced at him, concerned. Jim grabbed his guide’s hand and started his breathing exercises. Unlike its mother the baby seemed to find the new sensations fascinating and patted the walls of its current accommodation in excitement. Jim grimaced.  
 
“Jim?” Blair asked, ever vigilant over his mate.  
 
Jim shook his head. “The baby’s moving. Seems he likes magic.” He took a deep breath, trying to relax. His senses did not like the sudden changes and concentrations in the flows of magic.  
 
Blair grinned. “Takes after his father.” He moved his hand to gently massage Jim’s rounded belly, sending soothing nudges to the baby. Jim breathed a sigh of relief as the baby calmed down.  
 
***
 
The car they had rented was waiting for them at the airport. They stopped at a large store to buy some water and groceries. While they were there Jim added a couple of Harlequins to the cart, daring Blair to say a word about it. Wisely, his mate kept quiet. He knew when to humour the heavily pregnant love of his life.  
 
It was a few hours’ ride to the retreat. The weather was warm and Jim moved the car seat to a half reclining position to be better able to relax.  
 
“Feeling okay?” Blair asked.  
 
“Mmm-mm,” Jim purred. The headache from the flight had retreated and the warmth was caressing his limbs. He was definitely feeling better.  
 
***
 
The retreat was a sprawling complex of one and two-storied whitewashed buildings with colourful window shutters. Blair parked the car before the main building. A man about as tall as Jim, but twice as wide was waiting for them by the low steps to the main door of the retreat. The spiritualists would have sensed guests coming.  
 
“That’s Paul Cook, the director of the retreat,” Blair told Jim as he turned off the ignition and got out of the car. Jim followed him at a slower pace.  
 
“Mister Sandburg? I assume you’re here because of your mother. I do hope your travel has been unnecessary,” Mr Cook said as he shook hands with Blair. Blair had been to the retreat a few times, but Cook believed in keeping a polite distance.  
 
“So do I. Mr Cook, the retreat’s director. This is my mate and sentinel, Jim Ellison,” Blair introduced them. Jim had not been to the retreat before.  
 
“Happy to meet you and I do congratulate you,” the director said smiling serenely.  
 
“Thank you. Do you have any idea where Naomi might be?” Jim asked.  
 
Cook shrugged. “She left for solitary meditation four days ago. As by tradition, she did not say exactly were she was going and she didn’t take a tracking spell or communication equipment with her either.”  
 
“Do you know the general area where she was going?” Blair asked eagerly.  
 
“I believe she was going to go by the mesa near the crook of the river. We have not sensed any distress from her,” Cook pointed out.  
 
Blair nodded. “I’ve received a premonition. It’s not exactly urgent, but it is constant.”  
 
“And you feel compelled to investigate, I understand.”  
 
***
 
Cook invited them to stay in the retreat and set out in the morning, but Blair would not hear of it. They drove out of the retreat and into the large wilderness. There was a seldom-used path up to the mesa, rough, but you could drive up it. Blair had anticipated this and had rented a grand Jeep Cherokee. They had brought their tent and some basic camping equipment with them, so they could spend the night under the stars if they had to.  
 
After an hour’s ride the mesa was clearly visible in the distance. To a sentinel, anyways.  
 
“If she came here by foot, it would take her a couple of days to reach the area,” Jim commented.  
 
“I know. She would have followed the path. Have you sensed anything?”
 
Jim shook his head. “Just the usual small animals. We should put up camp soon, it’s getting near sunset.”  
 
“Yep. There’s a small pond by those trees up ahead,” Blair said, nodding towards the trees in question.  
 
Jim cocked his head, and zoomed in on the area. He could smell the water, and something else near one of the clusters. He could also hear another human being by the spring-fed pond. “Someone’s there. Smells like... sage?” Jim sneezed.  
 
Blair started. “Mom likes to camp there when she’s in the area. She favours a sage-based perfume. Is she all right?”  
 
“I don’t think so.”  
 
Blair cursed and hit the accelerator.  
 
***
 
It did not take long to reach the spot, but it felt way too long to Blair. There was a small tent a few feet from the pond. Blair stopped the car close to it and jumped out of it. Jim followed him at a lot more languid pace, having already figured out by the info his senses had given him that whatever was wrong it was nothing urgent.  
 
Blair ran to the tent, and to the lithe woman sitting on a small meditation mat beside it. She was pale and her left foot was swollen. She was holding it straight before her as it was too swollen to bend. She was holding a damp towel on it.  
 
“Blair! My heart is glad to see you,” she greeted the young guide.  
 
The mother and son hugged each other before Blair examined her leg.  
 
“It was a small serpent, Blair. I should have sensed it and stepped past it, but I was too immersed in my own thoughts. There had been something –“ Naomi stopped mid-sentence and stared at Jim who had walked to them, and slowly crouched down right outside the tent flaps.  
 
“Oh, I’m sorry. Mom, this is my mate and sentinel Jim. Jim, this is my mother, Naomi.”  
 
“Glad to meet you, Ms Sandburg,” Jim greeted the stunned woman.  
 
“Call me Naomi,” she said, sounding somewhat befuddled. “So this is what the dreams of kittens and cubs meant.” She stared at her very pregnant son-in-law. “Why on sweet mother Earth did I not think of it?”
 
“None of us are perfect, mom,” Blair grinned, feeling relieved that everything was going to be all right.  
 
***
 
Naomi had had some medication and healing herbs with her, but her leg had been too tender to walk with. She had decided to wait until the swelling came down a bit and then try to hobble back. Luckily the bite was not life threatening, just painful. Blair informed the retreat of their situation by the walkie talkie they had been given. They would all camp by the pond that night and return to the retreat next morning.  
 
“So, when are you due? You must be on the seventh or eight month,” Naomi estimated, looking at Jim’s stomach. The two were sitting by her tent in comfortable companionship.  
 
“About the middle of December,” Jim told her.  
 
“Near the Festival of Light, as light vanquishes darkness, that’s a good omen indeed. Have you decided on a name, yet?”
 
“No, not yet.” Jim had to admit he had not even thought of names that much, he had had other worries.  
 
“People are too relaxed about naming these days. A name is your ID tag, one should be careful about it.”  
 
Jim nodded. He had not thought about it that way.  
 
“I’ll meditate on it and send you a list of possible names,” Naomi promised.  
 
***
 
Naomi rode back to the retreat on the back of the jeep. The retreat’s healer was waiting for them as they arrived at the compound. The petite woman checked the leg and announced that it was healing well. Blair was relieved to hear it.  
 
Cook invited them to stay overnight and this time Blair did not refuse the invitation. The guesthouse was a cool oasis after the barren wilderness. The lunch was simple vegetarian pastries and rice, but it was well made and quite tasty. Jim spent the afternoon on the terrace of the guesthouse, resting in the wicker chair, relaxing in the warm sunlight and the gentle autumn breeze. He kept his senses stretched out. The retreat was quiet haven after the cacophony of the city and the natural scents were balm to his nose. The dinner buffet contained some meat dishes too, but those were too spicy for Jim.  
 
“Your mother seemed okay, for a spiritualist,” Jim commented to Blair as they were snuggling on the large bed.  
 
“She’ll want to bless the child at the Day of Light, you know,” Blair said. He was propped on his elbow, looking at a relaxed and almost purring Jim. He liked to caress and massage his mate’s growing stomach in the evenings. He could sense the life growing inside. It was an amazing sensation.  
 
“I know. She promised to mail a list of possible names for the baby.”  
 
“With long explanations about the meaning and history of each one, no doubt,” Blair grimaced, pausing in his caresses. “We could choose one ourselves.”  
 
“Let’s at least take a look at her suggestions,” Jim smiled at the apprehension in Blair’s voice.  
 
Blair nodded. “We don’t even know if it’s a he or a she.”  
 
“Do you want to know?” Jim asked as his mate resumed his caresses.  
 
Blair thought about it. “Nah, let’s wait.”  
 
***
 
Blair was in his office at the university going through his notes on the guarding spells of the temple grounds they had investigated when his computer beeped to inform him of a new message. Blair clicked on it. It was from his mom and it contained an attachment. Blair printed them both and walked to the printer in the hall.  
 
He smiled as he looked at six pages of names and their explanations.  
 
***
 
“There are only ten names here and this is all size ten font,” Jim said in amazement as he stood by the kitchen counter.  
 
“I told you so, remember?” Blair said smugly. “Mom takes her research seriously.”  
 
“Mm-mmm. Some of these are possibilities,” Jim said as he skimmed the pages.  
 
“Good,” Blair said, his mouth full of bread he had snatched from the basket on the counter. “How about save it until later and have dinner? After that, I think I could use some dessert.” Blair wrapped one arm to hug his sentinel, and moved it down to caress his still very fine and tempting butt.  
 
Jim grinned as he set the papers down. “Sounds good.”
 
***
 
November crawled on. The artificial lights, glittering light spells and blaring advertisements for the Festival gifts and paraphernalia were getting on Jim’s nerves. The gift and delicacy hunting crowds were suffocating.  
 
“And this is supposed to be a time of meditation and good will toward all,” Jim groused more than once.  
 
The wet snow and ice were unnerving for someone with excess weight and uncertain balance. Blair knew Jim was not feeling too good and took care not to get buried in his work. He did his best to do his share of the housework and cooking, and to continue the daily massages. Jim’s time was nearing and both the mother and the baby were getting impatient.  
 
“Have you thought about what you’re going to do after the baby’s born?” Blair asked one evening. He was sitting on the living room floor, massaging Jim’s feet. Jim was sitting on the couch, propped up by pillows.  
 
“Thought about, yes. But I really haven’t made any decisions.”  
 
“Search and rescue? CSI? Perfume or cosmetics company? Herbal company?” Blair listed the possible jobs for sentinels.  
 
Jim shrugged. “Search and rescue probably. The mountain station has a day-care centre in the premises.”
 
“Driving there and back wouldn’t take long, except during the weekends,” Blair said in thought. Jim was an experienced sentinel and would probably get the job if he applied for the position.  
 
“But that’s not topical for at least six months yet,” Jim pointed out. It would be some time before the baby could be weaned, longer than normally if it was a sentinel, but so far it looked like their child would be a magic user.  
 
***
 
Then came December. Jim had found out that baking was a soothing pastime, so there were enough pastries, cookies and cakes in the loft to feed a battalion of hungry people. Naomi had come to Cascade and was staying in a temple on the outskirts of town. Blair had kept in contact with Simon and Joel and the two had promised to come by during the Festival of Light to see Blair’s firstborn. A firstborn that seemed suspiciously calm these day, Jim groused, as if it was suddenly perfectly content to stay where it was.  
 
***
 
It was a quiet Saturday, the snow was falling lazily and the TV was showing festive cooking shows and old holiday movies. After all it was only a week until the Day of Light and a few days till the Festival week began. Blair was reading a draft of a paper he had written on the guarding spells he had found in the temple. He had been able to reconstruct a few, the rest were still a puzzle.  
 
Jim sat on the couch, watching an Asian woman explaining how to prepare a vegetarian dinner for the Day of the Light. It seemed to involve a lot of preparations, but then you just put half in the wok for a quick stir fry and served the other half raw in separate bowls.  
 
Jim felt yet another odd twinge inside him, he had been having them all morning. The baby was restless. He concentrated his senses inside himself, to find out what was wrong.  
 
His eyes flew open. “Blair?”  
 
“What?” the absent-minded academic asked, still looking at the papers and scribbling with the red pen in one hand.  
 
“I think you should get the nest ready, and then call the healer,” Jim announced calmly.  
 
“What?” Blair forgot all about the papers as he rose from the couch as if it burned his butt. The guide ran off to get everything ready. Jim smiled as he watched his guide, it looked like the calm academic had been evicted by a nervous soon-to-be father.  
 
“So you’re finally ready to face the world,” he murmured to the baby.  
 
***
 
The birth took about six hours, six long hours during which the contractions came at shorter and shorter intervals and the sentinel’s senses alternatively numbed down and spiralled up as they tried to figure out just what was happening. Finally, the healer announced that the time had come. Jim sat down on the birthing stool, Blair stood behind him, supporting his mate by putting his arms around him.  
 
“Now, Jim, as the next contraction starts, push,” the grey-haired healer advised him. He was sitting on the floor before the birthing-stool, ready to welcome the new life.  
 
Blair steadied Jim as his mate began to push, and pushed and pushed. Beads of sweat covered him and he shook slightly at the effort.  
 
“Doing good, Jim… There’s the head, a few more times… That’s it!” With a loud cry from both mother and child, a new life was brought into the world. The healer placed the newborn on the soft towels on the floor and cut the umbilical cord. As he swiped the baby with a warm wet cloth, it squalled and protested at the treatment. The child calmed as it was given to its mother.  
 
***
 
Jim had insisted that he wanted to stay downstairs and Blair had put a pillow on the coffee table so the sentinel could put his feet up. He looked on proudly as the mother and baby relaxed on the couch. Jim was practically purring as he held their child close to his chest.  
 
Blair walked to the couch with a tray with glasses of juice and a plate of pastries and cookies.  
 
“Mind if I hold him?” Blair asked softly, not wanting to disturb their son. Jim looked up, startled. He had been concentrating on the baby and had not noticed his grinning mate.  
 
“Not at all, he’s our son after all,” Jim smiled, as he passed the infant over.  
 
Blair put the tray down on the table and sat down on the couch next to Jim. He took the warm and precious bundle into his arms.  
 
“Hello there, son,” he cooed. “Welcome to the world, Ansel.”
 
***
 
“Ansel?” Simon asked as he looked at the baby soundly asleep in his mother’s arms.  
 
“Yes, it means blessed,” Blair explained. Jim returned his attention to the child in his arms.  
 
Simon nodded. He could understand why Blair and Jim had chosen that name.  
 
“Good luck to you all, and merry season,” Simon said softly. He turned to walk back to the buffet table. The loft was full of friends and relatives who had come for the Day of Light dinner and the house was full of laughter and merry talk, but the little one was snuffling softly in Jim’s arms, unaffected by the merriness around him. The loft had been decorated with fresh mistletoe and wreaths of green with the occasional brightly coloured light scattered around. Blair had lit large pillar candles as well here and there, to provide softer lighting.  
 
“You all right?” Blair asked as he looked at their son. Jim sat in the armchair by the fireplace with Blair standing behind him.  
 
“Yes, but I think I’ll take Ansel to his crib. Seems a full stomach makes him sleepy,” Jim commented, smiling. He tilted his head up to look at Blair.  
 
“A practical way of getting him to bed,” Blair grinned.  
 
“After the guests have gone, you can put me to bed,” Jim whispered, grinning.  
 
“With pleasure,” Blair answered readily, lowering his head to kiss his better half.  
 
Life was good.  
 
***
 
The End (of this chapter in their lives)